Kyouko's Shattered Heart
by TheBlackKid
Summary: Akari has revealed her relationship with Rise. Everyone's happy for them. But secretly, Kyouko isn't. In fact, she's completely heartbroken. This story follows her as she tries to cope with losing her one true love.
1. After The Party

Kyouko's Shattered Heart

By TheBlackKid

 **Chapter 1 – After The Party**

"You know, you guys didn't have to stay behind and help clean up. I could've done it myself."

"Come on, Akari. It's no big deal. After all, it is your birthday. Sorta." Yui said.

"Yeah, Yui's right." Chinastu agreed. "With Akane still feeling the effects of those 35 energy drinks and Sis taking care of her, that just leaves you to clean this mess."

"Geez, Chinastu. It's like you and Yui think that I can't do things because of my one-"

 ***BANG***

" _Ow…_ " Akari whined as she rubbed her head of the pain she got from running into the wall.

"You okay, Akari?" Chinastu asked.

"Yeah. I'm fine. Stupid wall. That's the 5th time today."

"The 5th time?! When were the other four?!" Yui asked.

"Bathroom, kitchen, my room, and bathroom again. The last one left a pretty big bruise, too."

"Akari…" Both girls said.

"What? My eyesight dropped by half. I can't help it if I bumped into stuff repeatedly."

"That's why you got us. Right, guys?"

"Right!" Chinastu cheered.

"…"

"Kyouko?"

"…"

"Kyouko!"

"H-Huh? O-Oh. S-Sorry, guys. I was just…spacing out." I said.

"You sure you're okay, Kyouko?" Chinastu asked. "You were like that during the whole party."

"I-I'm fine. R-Really, I am. Probably just tired. I'm just gonna head home now."

"You sure?" Akari asked.

"Yeah. I'm sure. See you guys at school tomorrow. Oh, and happy belated birthday, Akari."

"Thanks. Bye, Kyouko."

I waved to everyone as I opened the front door and walked outside. After closing the door, I started walking home at 9:45 at night. The party went on for longer than I thought. Everyone looked like they had fun. I had fun, too. And I was really happy to see Akari again after so long.

…

…

B-But…there was a second emotion I had during that party. And no, it wasn't a second helping of happiness.

Let's just say…Akari's depression had passed on to me.

* * *

"I'm home." I said as I entered my house.

"Oh hey, dear. Had fun at the party?" My mom asked me as I was walking past the living room.

"Yeah. I guess."

"You don't sound like it."

"I'm just tired. I'm gonna go to bed now."

"I see. Well, goodnight then."

"Goodnight."

I went up to my room and changed into some pajamas (most of my clothes were dirty at this point. So I had to wear my tomato onesie) before heading to bed.

But instead of going to sleep, I just laid there. Not sure how long. Probably about 20 minutes. But after a while, I turned to lay on my stomach…

Buried my head deep inside my pillow…

And began crying.

" _ ***sniff***_ _Akari…_ "

The truth is…I may have said that I was okay with the fact that Akari and Rise are a couple. But…in secret…I wasn't. I wasn't at all. When I found out that Akari had someone else to love, I wanted to run out of the house crying in heavy tears. I was so devastated. I felt like all of my hopes and dreams were crushed in just a matter of seconds.

But…I didn't want to say it. Not in front of them. They'll probably think I'm faking it or something.

" _But it's not fake! It's real! My love for Akari is 100% true! But it can never happen now! I was too late! Why couldn't I have realized these feelings earlier?! Why was I such an idiot back then?! Why?! Why?!_ _ **Why?!**_ "

I continued to cry these heavy tears of sadness and self-hatred until I finally cried myself to sleep. I kept getting horrible dreams of Akari rejecting my love, but in a darker tone.

I couldn't sleep for the rest of the night. As a dark void of sadness and despair floated over my head. My eyes were swollen from the excessive crying and barely holding up from how tired I was. I felt so weak. Physically, mentally, and emotionally. I was prepared to make this bed that I've had since I was a kid into my deathbed…

 _ ***BZZZT***_

…when my phone started going off.

" _ ***groan***_ _Who's calling me at this hour?_ " I weakly asked myself as I reached my phone. I looked at the bright screen (that took me a while to get used to) to see that it was actually a message.

From Ayano.

 _Why is Ayano up this late? It's only…oh. It's 6:30 in the morning. I was up all night again. Like that's anything new._

I looked at the message that Ayano sent me.

" _Hey, Kyouko. Can we talk a bit before school starts? It's really important?_ "

 _Really important, huh? Bet she's just here for an old handout I didn't turn in. No point avoiding that. It's either now, or at school. So I might as well get it over with.  
_

"Sure, Ayano. I'll meet you up the road." I texted back.

 _ ***BZZZT***_

" _Oh, there's no need. I'm already at your front door._ "

" **What?!** " I shouted.

 _Persistent much?!_

"Alright. I'll be down in a sec."

 _ ***BZZZT***_

" _Great. Thanks, Kyouko._ "

"Yeah, sure. Whatever." I didn't text that. But I close to doing so. I was so tired and grumpy from not sleeping all night. But I knew that I had to go to school. After missing a week for therapy sessions, one more day and I'm sure to get expelled.

Pretty sure my teachers wouldn't mind that, though. Thanks to my old self, they pretty much hate me right now.

 _ ***sigh***_ _Why was I so horrible?_

It took me a while to get dressed in my uniform due to how tired and weak I was. I felt like passing out at times. But I somehow managed to do it. And went downstairs to open the front door for Ayano.

" _Morning_ _ ***yawn***_ _Ayano._ " I said. Trying to sound like my normal cheery self.

But it didn't work.

"K-Kyouko? What happened to you? You look horrible."

" _Gee. Thanks._ " I got insulted. " _I'm just a little tired, that's all._ "

"That doesn't look like "a little"."

" _I'm_ _ ***yawn***_ _fine. Let's go_ _ ***yawn***_ _already._ " I tried walking out the door. But as soon as I took the first step, I collapsed and fell on the hard ground below.

" **H-Hey! Kyouko! Are you okay?! D-Don't die out on me! T-Toshinio Kyouko!** "

 _H-Have…Haven't heard…th-that in…a-a while…_

* * *

" _Ow…my head._ " I had woken up in my room back in my bed feeling less tired. But now my head is burning and it hurts like hell. Not to mention that I got the chills, too.

"What the? What am I doing back here? Wasn't I on my way to school?" I asked myself as I picked up my phone from my bed stand.

" **Huh?! It's already noon?! How long was I asleep?!** "

I got out of bed and stood up on my own two feet. That's when I noticed what I was currently wearing. A light-blue jacket and white shorts combo.

Now I was even more confused. And my head was getting worse from all this movement I'm doing.

As I reached for my bedroom door and tried to turn the knob, the door opened from the other side. And in came someone I least expected.

"Hey. Get back into bed, you."

"Wh-Wha? Ayano? What are you doing here?"

"I'll tell you later. Just get back into bed."

"Huh?!"

"Just do it!"

"Okay, sheesh! I'm going!"

Once I got into bed, my head started hurting more and more. It was burning hot while my body was freezing cold. I tried to think of what was going on right now, but the pain was too much for me to do it.

"Here. I went to the store and got you something." Ayano said as she handed me something from a shopping bag.

"Woah! You got me Rum Raisin?! Normally, Yui would get me this!"

"Just something to help you deal with your fever."

"My…fever?" I was confused.

"You were running a high fever when you suddenly collapsed in front of your house earlier. I had to carry you to your room and changed you out of your uniform before putting you to bed."

"I see. **Wait, you undressed me?!** " I started to blush once I repeated that one part in my head.

" **D-Don't make it sound perverted! I was trying to help you out!** "

"I know, but…y-you didn't see anything, did you?"

"No. I didn't. And why are you suddenly concerned about that?"

"W-Well…I-I have a sensitive side, you know."

"You? Sensitive? Since when?"

"Y-You know what? J-Just forget it." I said. Sounding insulted as I turned my back towards Ayano. "Thanks for bringing me up here. You can go now."

I was expecting to hear footsteps getting quieter as Ayano walked out of my room. But I didn't hear such a thing. In fact, I didn't a thing at all for a good 2 minutes or so. It was dead silent in here. And I don't know why, but I feel like Ayano…wants to say something.

"Kyouko. We need to talk."

 _ ***sigh***_ _I knew it._

"About what?" I asked.

"When I first saw you this morning, your eyes were all swollen and red. And when I placed you in your bed earlier, your pillow was soaking wet."

"So?"

"So, tell me. Were you…up all night crying?"

I didn't answer. More like, I didn't _**want**_ to answer. I just pouted and covered my head with my blanket.

"Hey. Don't try to avoid the question. Get back up here." Ayano yanked the blanket off me and left me exposed with my back still facing her.

"Kyouko."

I still didn't answer.

"Kyouko!"

Not one word came out of my mouth.

"Fine. I'm taking the Rum Raisin back."

" **Okay, fine! I'll tell you!** " I shouted as I shot up from the bed.

"See? Now was that so hard?"

"Shut up."

 _Damn my weakness to ice cream._

So then I told Ayano everything. How I lied when I said that I was okay with Akari and Rise being a couple. How I felt depressed during the party and on my way home. And how I did cry all night long. I even told her about the nightmares. And how they would make me even more depressed. Thus, I couldn't stop myself from crying in front of her.

"Kyouko…I had no idea you felt this way."

"No one did. I was hopefully trying to save it for my next therapy session, but you bribed it out of me. That was a mean thing to do, by the way."

"I know. I was wrong for that. But I was just so worried. Seeing you act like this isn't really like you."

"You mean my old self?"

"Well…"

" _ ***sigh***_ I just want to forget that part of me ever existed. It nearly killed my one true love."

" _Y…Yeah. Your one true love…_ " I noticed Ayano sounding sad as she said that. I felt like I just hurt her just now. I had no idea at first, but then I remembered what Ayano's real reason for coming here.

"Hey, Ayano. Did you say you wanted to talk to me about something?" I asked.

"Wh-What?! U-Uh…w-well…" Ayano started blushing extensively from me bringing this topic up. After a while, though…she calmed down enough to tell me what she had planned to tell me before all this happened.

"K-Kyouko. Th-This isn't easy for me to say this, but…last night. When you confessed your love for Akari. I-I kinda got…h-heartbroken."

"Heartbroken?"

"That confession. It just came out of nowhere. I mean, Sakurako's did too. But Himawari forced it out of her. But hearing that you love Akari, you could say that I…felt the same way you did when Akari rejected you."

I had to think about this for a second. Ayano saying that she felt the same way I did when I got rejected…could only mean one thing.

"A-Ayano. D-Do you…l-love me?" I asked.

Ayano didn't respond. At least, not verbally. She slowly shook her head as a way to confirm my guess. And after that, I had trouble saying anything. I had no idea that Ayano felt this way about me. To be honest, I thought she hated me because I kept bugging her a lot.

…

And, well…I kinda wish she did.

I don't want to say it to her, but I don't feel the same way for her. My love is and will forever be for Akari. Even though she's taken.

And besides, after all the times I've annoyed her to no end, I don't deserve her love. Not even sure what she saw in me in the first place.

 _But…if can take it, then maybe she can too._

"Ayano."

"Kyouko."

…

…

"I-I'm…I'm sorry. B-But…"

"It's okay, Kyouko. I know you don't love me the same way."

"H-Huh?"

"When you confessed last night, it was made clear for me. I've had these feelings for you since the day we've met. But I took so damn long to confess to you. And now I've lost you."

"A-Ayano…" I tried to stop her.

"But, like I said…it's okay. I now know that I must let these feelings go. They've clouded my mind for so long that I've even had Chitose to try to help me confess. Granted, none of her ideas were even worth trying."

"Well, duh. This is Chitose you're asking."

" _ ***giggle***_ Yeah, true." Ayano said with a smile.

"But…you're right, Ayano. About letting the feelings go. It's going to be hard. And even though I don't want to do it, I know that it's for the best for my sanity."

…

"K…Kyouko. I…I-I'm shocked." Ayano said after a moment of silence.

"I know. I am too. Never thought something that sentimental would come out of _**my**_ mouth, huh?"

"If I say yes, will you get angry?"

"Hmm…probably."

"Then yes. It's unbelievable."

" _Hey!_ " I got insulted.

" _ ***giggle***_ Sorry, sorry."

We then enjoyed each other's company for a while before Ayano's phone began ringing. Once she answered it…

" **AYANO HELP!** "

"Huh?! Himawari?! Wh-What going on?!"

" **IT'S CHITOSE! SHE'S TURNED INTO A BLOOD FOUNTAIN OVER HERE!** "

" **MY YURI SENSES ARE GOING CRAZY! MY MOST DESIRABLE FANTASY IS COMING TRUE! KEEP GOING, YOU TWO! SEND ME TO THE GREAT YURI HEAVEN IN THE SKY!** _ **HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!**_ "

" **CH-CHITOSE! CALM DOWN!** " We heard Yui in the background.

" **PL-PLEASE HURRY, AYANO! IT'S FILLING UP QUICKLY!** " Himawari screamed in fear.

"Okay, okay! I'll be right there! Just hold on!" Ayano said before hanging up the phone and facepalming her face hard.

" _What the hell?_ " I asked weakly. Not believing what was happening in the student council room.

"I know. Sometimes I wonder how the hell I got used to it."

"I feel so sorry for you, Ayano."

"Don't. It's what I deserve for accepting it when we first met."

"I-I see."

"Well, I better get going. If I don't, our friends are going to drown in Chitose's blood."

"Yeah, I get it. thanks for taking care of me, Ayano. And thanks for the talk, too. It kinda helped. A little."

"You're welcome, Kyouko. I feel the same way." Ayano said. Her smile getting bigger from the extra happiness she was receiving. I was in the middle of gaining a smile of my own…

When...out of nowhere…

"Oh, hey. One more thing. Do you have any handouts to turn in? I'm missing a few from you."

…

…

I didn't answer Ayano. Instead, I grabbed the container of Rum Raisin and threw it at her. Unfortunately, she closed the door in time for the ice cream to hit against it. And it fell to the ground.

" **NOT FUNNY, JERK!** " I shouted.

As I sat on my bed pouting, I saw that the container of Rum Raisin was still in-tact. And after staring at it for a while, I got up and grabbed it. Opening the lid and taking a scoop with a spoon.

 _Mmmm…so good._

 _ **AUTHOR'S NOTE:**_ **Well, I did say I'll come back with a new story. And here it is. I've thought about writing a story that explores Kyouko's sensitive side (yes, even she can be sensitive. You just gotta make it work). Therefore, this story will be entirely in her POV. Hope you guys enjoy it. Feel free to review, favorite, and/or follow the story. Thanks for reading. Later.  
**


	2. The Unlikely Ally

**Chapter 2 – The Unlikely Ally**

"Hmm…my fever seems to be going down. I guess the extra hours of sleep really helped out in the end. Well…probably that or the Rum Raisin. _Ooh! I wish I had another container right now!_ "

…

"…And I just realized that I said that to no one."

 _Being alone sucks._

It was a couple hours after Ayano had left to help the others with Chitose and her…blood fountain (that's so creepy to even think about). School should be out by now. So with me missing another day, I bet I'm expelled now.

 _I guess the teachers were right about me being a NEET_

" _ ***sigh***_ Maybe I'll go back to bed." I said. But as I was getting up, my phone was ringing again. I looked at it and saw that it was another message from Ayano.

" _Hey, Kyouko. Good news. I managed to convince our teachers that you were really sick today and couldn't come to school. So your absence got excused. No need to worry about getting expelled._ "

" **H-How did she know about that?!** " I shouted to no one. After calming down a little, I typed a response.

"Uh…thanks, Ayano. That…really helped."

 _ ***BZZZT***_

" _Yui and I will be over there in a few for a study session._ "

" **WHY?!** "

 _ ***BZZZT***_

" _Just because you missed a day, doesn't mean you get to miss out on studying for the entrance exam._ "

"No, I mean why are you bringing Yui? Her way of studying would probably make me sick again."

 _ ***BZZZT***_

" **HEY!** "

"Huh? Where did that…" I had no idea at first, but after looking more closely, I realized…

…that I was in a group chat.

 _Aw, crap._

"I WAS JUST KIDDING, YUI! YOU KNOW HOW IMMATURE I AM ALL THE TIME, RIGHT?! HAHAHAHA!" I texted back with a panicked state of mind.

 _ ***BZZZT***_

" _Uh-huh. Right._ " Was Yui's response. Knowing her, she probably wrote it sarcastically.

 _I know I'm gonna get it when she gets here._

 _ ***BZZZT***_

" _Anyway…see you soon, Kyouko._ " Ayano texted.

"God, give me strength." Again, I didn't text that. But I was so close to doing so. I was still feeling sick from the fever.

And plus…I was still feeling depressed about yesterday.

I wasn't lying when I said that Ayano was right. I do need to move on from this. But honestly…it's easier said than done.

 _This was the first time I've ever fallen in love with someone. Only to be rejected in front of everybody. I know Akari didn't mean to do it that way. It's my own damn fault for not waiting for her to talk first._

 _And besides, why the hell would she love someone who pretty much forgot she existed for nearly two years? And then on top of that, someone who, due to their carelessness and laziness, made her lose an eye? Why the hell did I think it would be so damn easy?_

" _ ***sniff***_ _Akari…why? Why are you even still friends with me? I'm such a horrible person. And yet, you still call me a friend. You're way too kind to someone like me._ "

I didn't realize it until now, but at some point, I had started crying while curled up in a fetal position. My shattered heart has now been fully revealed to the outside. If I wasn't depressed before, then I definitely am now.

I can't think of anyone who can relate to what I'm feeling right now.

…

Well…there is one person. But…

 ***KNOCK* *KNOCK* *KNOCK***

" _ ***sigh***_ _They're already here._ "

I got up from the fetal position and slowly walked up to the front door. While doing so, I was trying to look happy. Ayano may know how I'm feeling right now, but I don't want Yui to know. I don't tell her this, but she's dense as hell when it comes to these type of problems.

 ***KNOCK* *KNOCK* *KNOCK***

"Alright. I'm coming." I said as I got to the door. When I opened it, I was expecting Ayano and Yui to be at the door. With the latter having an annoyed look on her faces because of what I said earlier.

I always hated that face. But after seeing who it was at the front door, I kinda wish it _**was**_ that face I was looking at.

"Hey, Kyou-"

 ***SLAM***

" **H-Hey! Open up!** "

" **Go away, Sakurako! You're the absolute LAST person I want to see right now!** " I yelled through the door.

" **Please, Kyouko! Open the door! I wanna talk!** "

" **Why the HELL would I want to listen to you?!** "

…

…

"I…I want to apologize." She said in a soft tone. Almost a depressed one.

I thought about this moment. And even though I didn't want to, I opened the door.

"You better make this good and quick, Sakurako." I said as I allowed her to come inside my house.

* * *

As we walked back to the living room, Sakurako didn't say anything. Sure, I found it odd. And something not normal to her personality. But as of right now, I couldn't care less about her problems. I've got my own to deal with.

And technically, she caused some of them.

"Alright, Sakurako." I said as we got to the living room and sat down on the floor face-to-face. "What do you want?"

"Like I said, I want to apologize. About…wh-what happened yesterday."

"Yesterday?"

"Y-You know…w-with our love confessions. And being rejected."

" **Tch!** " I felt a really sharp pain in my heart when she said that final word. "J-Just what's your point, already?!" I started getting irritated.

"Okay, okay." Sakurako said. "Well…I was wondering why you weren't in school today. I was going to ask Yui if she knew, but then I overheard her talking to Ayano. She told her how you weren't doing so well after…what happened yesterday."

 _Damnit. So she did tell Yui. Now I'm in for some serious hell._

"Okay, so why are you here?" I asked.

"Because. I want you to know…that you're not alone."

…

…

"Huh?" I was definitely confused after hearing that.

"Wh-What I mean is…I'm feeling the same way as you are right now. I feel…depressed. Miserable. Heartbroken. Akari was my first love, too. I've loved her since the day I first laid eyes on her during our first day of middle school. I wanted to tell her then, but I was too scared too.

And then the whole "she has no presence" thing started. And due to me being too afraid to confess to her, I just played along with it.

But every time I was alone, whether at school or at home, I cry heavy tears of self-hatred. For even allowing myself to be a part of what was clearly a way of bullying the one person I love."

Sakurako then fell to the floor and started crying as she started remembering how _**she**_ treated Akari these past two years.

" _ **Why, Akari?! Why?! Not only did you reject my love, but you also keep calling me a friend! I don't deserve you! Not even your friendship! Not after how I've treated you before the accident! So why are you still friends with me?! Why?! Why?! WHY?!**_ "

I sat there while I watched Sakurako cry her eyes out. She sounded serious when she said all that. The depression, the self-hatred, the clear signs of being heartbroken. It was all there. She really was feeling the same way I was. I thought I was the only one who was hit hard in the gut with this problem. But to see with my own two eyes that Sakurako was suffering as well…it kinda made me feel bad that I hated her for the past few hours.

"Sakurako." I said. She got up from the floor and looked at me with her teary red eyes. "I'm sorry, too. I blamed you for losing Akari. But in reality, it was my fault from the start. If I wasn't such a selfish lazy idiot and moved those toys from that damn shelf, Akari would still have both her eyes and we wouldn't be feeling this way about ourselves. I'm all to blame for this crap!" I then started to cry myself. Blaming myself once again for everything that's happened these past few weeks.

And basically ruining Akari's life.

"But…" Sakurako said. "You have to admit…she does seem happier now than before."

" _Happier?_ How can anyone be happy with losing an eye?"

"Well, okay. She wasn't happy with it at first. But did you see her at the party yesterday? She seemed happy. I don't know from what, since the last time I saw her before then was the day I confessed to her. But at the party, she looked like she was really happy."

This was hard for me to believe (then again, the same can be said about me), but Sakurako was right.

"Yeah...she did look happy. Probably because we were all there." I said.

"And well, when you think about it…if Akari didn't lose an eye, we would probably be still participating in that "no presence" thing."

" _Ugh._ Tell me about it. Who the hell thought of that anyway?"

"Probably some asshole who likes bullying people."

"Yeah, no doubt."

Then I thought to myself for a bit. And grew a frown on my face.

"What's wrong?" Sakurako asked me.

"Nothing. It's just…for some reason, I feel like… **I'm** that asshole."

"Oh." Sakurako then went silent for a bit. "Well, it's probably nothing then."

"I guess…"

"Hey, thanks for listening to me, Kyouko. I knew you would be mad at me for what happened. Truth is, I was mad at you too. But then I heard how you were dealing with this mess. And I felt bad for those arguments we had."

"You know, Sakurako. I feel a lot better after talking to you. Like a bunch of built-up stress was released from inside me. It felt…nice."

"Yeah. It really did."

 ***KNOCK* *KNOCK* *KNOCK***

"Ah, geez. Here they are." I said.

"Who?" Sakurako asked.

"Ayano and Yui. They said they were coming over today."

"I see."

I got up and started heading for the front door. I opened it and saw Yui and Ayano standing outside.

"Hey, guys." I said.

"Kyouko, what's wrong? Your eyes are red." Ayano said to me.

"Uh…allergies. Yeah, that's it. It's just allergies."

"Allergies? What are you allergic to?" Yui asked. "And don't say "studying"."

 _Crap!_

"Uh…

…well…

…I'm allergic to…

…

…

…

…life."

"Life?" They both asked.

"Yep. I'm allergic to life. It's basically killing me with how much I have to do in it. I really wish that it was easier. Hahahaha."

" _ ***sigh***_ Honestly, Kyouko. You're just hopeless sometimes." Yui said with an annoyed look on her face.

 _And for once, I agree with you._

"So, can we come in now?" Ayano asked.

"Uh, yeah. Sure. Come in. My mom's not home. So we can go to the living room."

"Okay. Sounds good."

We went to the living room where I left Sakurako, who was just flipping through the channels on the TV.

"Oh hello, Sakurako. You came here to study as well?" Yui asked her.

…

…

"What?" Sakurako's face went pale when she heard that one word.

 _I don't blame you, girl._

"We came here to study with Kyouko for our high school entrance exams." Ayano said.

"I-I see…well, good luck with that. I'm going to go do…literally anything else." Sakurako then got up and headed for the front door.

"Don't you have homework to do?" Ayano asked her.

"Sorry. Can't hear ya." Sakurako then closed the door behind her. Leaving me with these two know-it-alls.

"So. Shall we get started?" Ayano asked.

"Y-You know, should I _**really**_ be studying right now? I am still sick. ***cough* *cough*** "

"Oh, no. You're not getting out of this one." Yui said. "Especially after what you said earlier."

"Can't you just let that go?"

"Hmm…maybe. Give me an hour of studying and I'll think about it."

"How is _**that**_ fair?!"

"No complaining, Kyouko. We've gotta get this done." Ayano said. "Oh, by the way. You got any snacks we can eat while doing this?"

"Fine. I'll go check."

As the two went to go sit down, I went to the kitchen to find some snacks that will hopefully help me survive this study session.

 _I've should've reconsidered being a NEET…_

 _ **AUTHOR'S NOTE:**_ **Kyouko and Sakurako can actually relate to each other. Could they go back to being friends after this? Read on to find out. Feel free to review, favorite, and/or follow the story. Thanks for reading. Later.**


	3. Amusement Club Bad Future

**Chapter 3 – Amusement Club Bad Future**

 _Ugh…damnit, Yui. You are absolute hell when it comes to studying. Now my head hurts from you cramming stuff in there. At least the exam's this weekend. So I won't have to worry about study after that._

It was the next day and I was feeling well enough to go back to school. So I was dressed in my uniform and had my schoolbag in hand as I met up with my mom in the kitchen.

"Morning." I said.

"Morning, sweetie. Feeling better?"

"Yeah. Somewhat better. My head hurts from studying for 4 hours straight yesterday."

"So I've heard. Well, good luck with that."

"Gee thanks, Mom." I said. Feeling a little upset at the answer she gave me. "Well, I'm off."

"Oh, Kyouko. Before I forget, you have a therapy session this weekend. It's on Saturday."

"Saturday? Which means I only get a few hours to relax before the entrance exam on Sunday. Great."

"Well, you're the one who wanted to do this remember?"

" _ ***sigh***_ Yeah, I know." I said as I opened the door and went outside the house.

The weather was nice outside. Which is to be expected, since it is springtime right now. For a few blocks, I was walking alone. Passing by buildings crossing streets. Often looking at the morning sky above me. It was somewhat relaxing for me after the two horrible days I've had. I know I've said before that being alone sucks, but now I was starting to appreciate being alone for once in my life.

But I knew it wouldn't last long, as I starting seeing other students with the school uniform along the way. Which meant that in a matter of time, some of my friends will show up.

"Hey! Kyouko!"

And that time is now.

Heading towards me were Yui, Chinastu, and…Akari.

 _Geez. Maybe I should've stayed home today._

"Hey, everyone." I said in a normal tone.

"Hey what's wrong, Kyouko? You seem sad." Chinastu asked.

"Uh…"

"Kyouko's not feeling all that well. She had a fever yesterday." Yui answered.

"Y-Yeah. That's it. A fever."

"I see. Kinda explains why you haven't jumped on me and tried to cuddle me to death."

"And I would be trying to separate the two of you." Yui added.

"L-Look, I'm just not in the mood, okay? And even if I was, I grew out of that. Let's just go, please."

As I turned around and started walking again, I was grabbed by someone and they wouldn't let go. Had a strong grip, too. Either that, or I'm weaker than I thought I was.

"Kyouko. I'm sorry."

 _Th-This is Akari's hand?! Why is she so strong?!_

"Sorry for what, Akari? You didn't do anything."

"You know what I mean. About what happened Tuesday. And how I did it."

"Akari. It's okay. Really, I'm fine. As long as you and Rise are happy, I'm happy." I started holding in my tears once I said that.

"B-But…"

"I just remembered that I have class duty today. So I'm just gonna go on ahead. See ya." I somehow got free from Akari's grasps and started running from the three girls.

"K-Kyouko! Wait!" I heard Yui shout out.

But I ignored her. I just kept running until I got to the school. Tears flowing from my eyes as I took each step.

* * *

I ended up getting to school 30 minutes before homeroom starts. Which gave me enough time to be alone for a while. So I went to the nearest bathroom, went inside a stall, locked it…

…and let out all of my tears.

" _Her hand…it was so soft and warm. It was a sweet and delightful pleasure. But in the end, it just brought on more depression and sadness for myself. These feelings I have for my best friend, and how they'll never be recognized. The emptiness in my heart will never be filled again. It'll always be shattered._ "

"A shattered heart? That's not a thing, you know."

" _Huh?_ "

I looked up from my crouching position to see someone doing something no girl wants to happen when they're in a bathroom stall.

Then again, seeing how I know this person, I'm not sure if this counts.

" _ ***shriek***_ **Wh-What the hell?! Kaede?! What are you doing here?!** " I shouted as I held down the bottom of my uniform to block the view.

"There was nobody to watch me at home, so Sis brought me to school with her."

" **No, I mean why are you PEAKING UNDER THE STALL?!** "

"Oh, that. Well, you were taking too long and I really have to go."

"There are other toilets, you know." I sounded irritated.

" _But those are too big for me. You're hogging up the kiddie toilet._ " Kaede whined as she was trying to hold it.

 _Since when did this school had a kiddie toilet?_

" _Ugh._ Fine. Get out the way so I can open the door."

" _Thank you…K-Kyouko._ "

I'm not sure why I waited for Kaede to finish, but I did. And so now, I was taking her to the student council room because she said Himawari was there. I was already in a bad mood from what happened earlier. I didn't feel like babysitting someone this early in the day.

"So there was really no one to watch you at home?" I asked Kaede.

"No, not really. But it's okay. Sis brings me here all the time. So it's normal."

 _It shouldn't be normal._

"I see."

"But anyway, Kyouko. You sounded really sad back there. What happened? Your favorite anime got canceled?"

"No." I answered while sounding insulted. "And why is that your first guess?"

"Well, since you're a massive otaku, I thought minor stuff like that would trigger you to start crying like a little kid having a temper tantrum."

 _I'm seriously getting insulted by a 5-year-old! What the hell, life?!_

"Look, I just don't want to talk about it. So just drop it already. And don't tell anyone I was crying in the bathroom."

"Alright, fine." Kaede said.

"Anyway, here's the student council room. Tell the others I said hi. I'm going to class."

"Huh? You're not going in yourself?"

"Like I said, I don't want to talk about it."

"You know, Kyouko. Holding in whatever it is you're feeling will only make it worse for you."

"I'm going to start ignoring you now." I said as I started walking away from the little Furutani sister.

 _Although I have to admit…she is right._

* * *

Classes weren't as bad as I thought it would be. I managed to stay up for all of them, despite being tired from the past two days. I think I even did a few assignments in the process. It's all too blurry for me.

But what wasn't was the reactions I got from people in my class. They were shocked that I stayed up and did work for once. Even the teachers were surprised. At least I can say one good thing came out from this horrible day today.

But now it was after school. And I was heading for the clubroom to hopefully get some time to be alone with my thoughts.

 _Hopefully, I can keep my crying to a low volume._

I was only a few steps away when I saw the building from a distance. But I decided to run to it, I almost ran into a blockade of barriers and signs that blocked the rest of the path.

"What the? What is all this?" I asked myself. I then saw one of the signs posted on a nearby tree and walked up to it to read it.

" _This area is permanently off limits to students, teachers, and faculty. DO NOT ENTER!_ "

" **What?! It's closed off?!** " I shouted in anger.

"Kyouko!"

I turned around with my still upset face to see Chinastu running up to me."

"Chinastu, what is this?! Why is the clubroom blocked?!"

"Think about it, Kyouko. Why would it be blocked off?"

I did give it a good thought. And it didn't take long for me to figure out why our club room was off limits to everyone here.

And I started going right back to feeling sad and depressed.

" _Aw, damn. That's right. What happened to Akari…_ " I said weakly as I slumped down on the tree and started crying once more.

" **K-Kyouko! Are you okay?!** " Chinastu asked in a panicked state.

I didn't even care that she was there. I just kept on crying. So much has happened because and I'm to blame for them all. Akari losing an eye, Ayano feeling heartbroken, the clubroom being blocked off, it was all my fault! I caused all this drama because of my selfishness and incompetence!

" _Hopeless. It's all I am. Just too damn hopeless._ " I whispered in a depressed tone.

"Kyouko…" Chinastu said.

" _Useless. Idiot. Scum of the earth. That's all I am. Just a heartless jerk who ruins other people's lives._ "

" _K-Kyouko…_ " Chinastu was now sounding a little scared.

"Chinastu? Did you find…" Yui was in the middle of asking when she, Ayano, and Chitose walked up to us. They were now all staring at me crying and saying bad stuff about myself.

Meanwhile, I was lost in my own sad and depressed mind. My heart was completely shattered and now my brain was too. I hated myself. Hated myself for everything I've done to make my friends and family's lives harder than it should.

" _I'm a nuisance. Annoying. Pain in the ass. I ruin everything. And it can't be helped. I even ruined my own life. And now I can never be happy._ "

"K-Kyouko! Wh-What are you saying?!" Ayano asked.

"Y-You're starting to scare us, Kyouko." Chitose added.

I ignored them all. And instead, looked at a nearby stick that was on the ground. It had a sharp point at one of the sides. And it gave me an idea. One I'm not entirely proud off, but my depression and feeling of emptiness made the decision for me.

"Kyouko…wh-what you doing with that stick?" Yui asked as I picked up the stick. The sharp pointed side facing towards me. I stared at the stick, then at my friends, then back at the stick.

Until finally…I said these words…

" _G-Goodbye…e-everyone._ "

…before stabbing myself in the neck with the stick.

" **KYOUKO!** "

I remember falling down on the dirt path with ounces of blood pouring from my neck. I watched as my friends screamed and cried in horror of what they just saw…

…before passing out. Believing that I had died.

 _ **AUTHOR'S NOTE:**_ **I know that this has gone dark rather fast, but TRUST ME! THIS STORY WILL GET BETTER! I just had to make it dark for a bit in order to make the light and heartwarming stuff work out. This is NOT the end! Just please, bear with it for a little while. Next chapter will explain it all. Thanks for reading, and I'm deeply sorry if anyone felt uncomfortable with the ending. Later.**


	4. Kyouko's Depression

**Chapter 4 – Kyouko's Depression**

" _ ***moan***_ _ ***moaning continued***_ "

"Guys…guys! She's waking up!"

"Oh, thank God!"

" _Wh…What? Wh-Where am I?_ " I asked. I had woken up on a bed in the hospital. Surrounded by what looked like my friends and…even my mom? My eyes were so blurry, so I couldn't really see everyone clearly.

" _ **Kyouko! Thank goodness you're okay! You had me so scared!**_ " It sounded like Mom's voice as I felt a great mass around my weak body.

" _M-Mom?_ "

"So I see that you've awakened from your coma, Ms. Toshinio." I heard another voice. A deep one, to be exact. I looked to the right of me and saw a white blur getting closer to me. Seeing how I'm in a hospital, this white blur had to be the doctor.

" _C-Coma?_ "

"You had lost so much blood by the time you got here, we had to put you in a medically induced coma. You were out for a month."

" _A-A month?_ "

"That stick was only near inches from the internal carotid artery, which supplies blood to your brain. We put you in that coma so that your brain wouldn't swell up. You're lucky that your friends brought you here as quick as they did. They pretty much saved your life."

" _R-Really?_ "

"I'll leave you all alone for a bit. I'm sure you want to catch up with each other."

"Thank you, doctor." I heard Mom said.

As the doctor left the room, I felt the giant scar on the right side of my neck. Patched up with a huge line of stitches. But then, after apparently laying in this bed unconscious for a month, I remembered…how I got this massive scar.

"Kyouko. I'm so happy that you're okay now." With my eyesight still blurry, I was now hearing Yui's voice. "You had us all scared that you wouldn't survive and…"

" _Y-Yui…why?_ " I interrupted her.

"Huh?"

" _Why? Wh-Why did you all…s-save me?_ "

"Whoa, whoa, whoa. What do you mean "why?"?"

" _I mean…there's a reason…why I stabbed myself in the neck. That's what…suicide is, right?_ "

"W-Wait a second." I was now hearing Ayano's voice. "K-Kyouko. A-Are you saying…"

" _Yeah. I wanted to die. I wanted to bleed out from that stabbing so that I wouldn't live anymore._

 _I wanted…to cease from existence._

 _But you all saved me. And now I'm still here. Why? Why did you guys save my life? Why didn't you let me die? We all would've been happy. If I…if I was six feet under right now._ "

" **Kyouko! Stop saying that crap!** " Yui shouted.

" _Why, Yui? It's the truth. I'm nothing more than a nuisance to everyone. Including me. I make everyone unhappy. Including me. I hate myself and just want to die already._ "

" _K-Kyouko…sweetie…y-you're scaring me._ " Mom said. Struggling to hold in her tears.

" _S-Sorry, Mom. But it's the truth. I didn't tell anyone…because I didn't want to make anyone feel worse about me._ "

"Wh-What about that talk we had, Kyouko? Didn't that mean anything to you?" Ayano asked.

"W-We were both smiling at each other when we forgave each other! What happened to that?!" I was now hearing Sakurako's voice.

" _W-Well…_ " I had to think about this on my own. " _D-Don't get me wrong. They did make me feel better…but not for long. I went back to being depressed the next day._ "

It was around this time my eyesight had returned. And seeing everyone's sad and tear-filled faces was only making me feel more depressed.

" _ ***sigh***_ _Being happy again is just completely hopeless. Just like me._ "

"Kyouko." I looked over to the person who called my name. And honestly, this was the one person I _**really**_ didn't want to know about this state I'm in.

" _A…Akari…._ " Her face was just as teary as the others. But the only (and main) difference was that her tears looked bigger and more powerful due to only having one tear duct.

"Kyouko, please stop saying those things. They're not true."

" _B-But…_ "

"No! Listen to me!" Akari yelling that took everybody off guard. She rarely yells. So to hear her do such a thing…

"S-Sorry." She ended up apologizing. "But seriously, you really need to stop blaming yourself for everything. That's what's hurting you."

" _B-But…th-that day…th-the accident…_ "

"I know you feel bad for it. It may have made me feel the same way you're feeling now, but I'm slowly getting by. Trying to forget that day ever happened is an impossible and pointless thing to do. I know because I look at it every morning I wake up. But I'm not going to let it ruin me. And you should do the same."

Hearing Akari say these words…I couldn't think of a way to respond to them. So I just kept silent and turned my head a little.

"And plus…I really am sorry for hurting you at the party."

 _ ***sigh***_ _This again?_

"I know that's the main reason why you tried to kill yourself."

…

" _Wh…What?_ " I asked in shock as I faced Akari again.

"It was selfish of me to reveal my secret relationship with Rise like that without a care in the world. I gave little thought to how you or Sakurako would feel afterward. _I felt so guilty…being the cause of your suicide attempt. I stayed here with you every single day that you were unconscious. Constantly apologizing to you for possibly making you take your own life. I would sometimes cry myself to sleep on the rails._ _ **It was the worst month of my life! I'm sorry, Kyouko! I really am! Please forgive me! Waaaa!**_ "

I watched as Akari fell to her knees and started crying hard. It was painful. More painful than me stabbing myself with that sharp stick. Me feeling this way, and trying to commit suicide. It was only hurting her more. And everyone else, too. Now I was the one feeling guilty. I put my friends and my mother through so much hell because I was too much of a coward to tell them how I truly felt this whole time.

I truly am a selfish jerk. Not because of my old self. But because of how I treated them all now.

" _ ***sniff***_ _Akari, Mom, everyone. I…I'm sorry. I'm sorry for keeping these feelings a secret for so long. It's just…I felt alone inside. It wasn't this extreme before. But going to those therapy sessions made me start feeling worse about myself._ "

"Kyouko, why didn't you say those sessions weren't working?" Mom asked me.

" _I…I wanted to, but that lady…she scares me. I always dreaded going back there. But I kept it to myself._ "

"Kyouko, I…"

 ***RING* *RING* *RING***

"Ugh, really? Now, of all times?" Mom complained as she took out her phone. " _ ***sigh***_ And it's work, too. I told them not to call me when I'm here."

"It's okay, Ms. Toshinio. We can take it from here." Yui said.

"Thanks, girls. I'll be back, sweetie."

" _Alright._ " I said as Mom left the room to answer the call. Which left me alone with Yui, Ayano, Akari, Chinastu, and Sakurako.

" _So was I…really out in a coma for a month?_ " I asked.

"Yeah. It was really bad." Yui replied. "The doctors believed that it would be longer than that."

I did a sigh of sadness for actually having a chance of that happening to me.

"You missed the entrance exam. And we're actually halfway through summer break." Ayano added. "Which means that…well…"

"Just tell her, Ayano. There was nothing else we could do." Yui said to her.

" _Huh? Tell me what?_ " I asked.

Yui and Ayano looked at each other with worried looks before Ayano continued talking.

"Kyouko…it means that you have to miss a year of school."

…

…

" _What?_ " I asked.

"Since you couldn't take the entrance exam, the school had no choice but to hold you back a year. We kept telling them that you were in the hospital nearly surviving a suicide attempt. But to them, it didn't serve as a reasonable excuse."

" _ **S-Seriously?!**_ **GAK!** " I yelled, which caused a sharp pain in my neck from the giant scar.

"Hey. You shouldn't yell like that. You only just woke up." Chinastu said.

" _B-But this is insane! What the hell am I going to do for a whole year?!_ "

"Don't worry, Kyouko. We'll all keep you company." Sakurako said.

" _Thanks, Sakurako. But that doesn't really help me with anything._ "

And as if I thought my situation couldn't get any worse than it already is…

"Uh…hey, Kyouko. I've…got some bad news." Mom said as she came back inside the room."

 _Why do I felt like I just jinxed myself?_

" _What bad news?_ " I asked.

"Well…my boss just called me and said that I have to…go overseas for work."

" _ **Wh-What?! S-Seriously?!**_ **GAK!** " I yelled, causing my neck to hurt again.

"Overseas? To where?" Akari asked.

"Somewhere in England. Not sure where. And they want me to be there for a year."

"A year? Damn, that sucks." Sakurako said.

" _ ***whine***_ _Why do bad stuff always happen to me?_ " I asked as a fell back on my bed.

 ***SOUND OF A DING COMING FROM AN INTERCOM***

" _Attention, everyone. Visiting hours are now over. Please make your way to the exit. Thank you for visiting._ "

"Geez. It's already time to go." Ayano said.

"Yeah. Don't worry, Kyouko. We'll be back tomorrow." Chinastu said.

"And we'll tell the others that you woke up from your coma, too." Sakurako added.

" _ ***sigh***_ _Thank you…everyone._ " I said.

As everyone left the room (including my mom, who was showing them out before staying with me), I laid in my bed thinking of all the things that happened in the past, and everything that's going to happen once I get out the hospital. My mom's going to be overseas for a year _**and**_ I'm held back a year from school.

 _So I have a second chance at life, huh? I can only hope it gets better than how it is so far…_

This was my last thought for the day. Before closing my eyes and going to sleep for the night.

 _ **AUTHOR'S NOTE:**_ **Kyouko survives! And it was close, too. Now she slowly accepts the fact that she can't hide her true emotions anymore and tries to move on from the past. No doubt it will be difficult for her to do.**

 **So Kyouko being held back a year is actually based on an anime I watched called Slow Start. Where, after getting sick during entrance exams, the main character had to miss a year of school. And thus, she started high school as a year older than the rest of the people in her class. It's basically about her struggling to tell her new friends this secret. It's good. And it has its funny moments, too.**

 **Feel free to review, favorite, and/or follow the story. The next chapter will explain why Kyouko hated the therapy sessions. Although it won't come for a little while. Got other stories to work on. Thanks for reading. Later.**


	5. The Therapist

**Chapter 5 – The Therapist**

The doctors won't let me leave until next week due to the fact that I'm still on a suicide watch. I'm 2 days in, and still breathing. So I don't really know why I'm still here.

Then again, they're only doing their job. I guess.

There's really nothing much to do in here. Well, besides watching whatever anime reruns that looked interesting. Which wasn't much. I still like them, but after watching a ton of them 2 days in a row, **AND** 3 more on the way, I need a break from it.

" _ ***sigh***_ _Now what do I do?_ "

I then felt a small pain coming from my neck once again. The giant scar hurts every time I talk. And my voice is so low and scratchy, it sounds like I'm whispering.

" _Hopefully, this scar will be healed by the time I'm able to go to school again. After all, I have_ _ **plenty**_ _of time…_ "

…

…

" _ ***sigh***_ _I need to stop._ "

 ***KNOCK* *KNOCK* *KNOCK***

" _Come in._ " I responded. The door opened to see that only one of my friends came to visit today. That friend…was someone I didn't really expect.

"Hey, Kyouko."

" _Oh. Chinastu. It's just you today?_ "

"Yeah. Everyone else is busy today. What with school coming up and…" Chinastu covered her mouth and looked at me with a feeling of guilt. "S-Sorry."

" _No. It's okay. I've already accepted the fact anyway. Nothing I can do about it._ "

"I see."

With nothing else to do in here, the two of us ended up chatting with each other. I asked Chinastu what exactly did I miss for the past month. I don't know why she was hesitant at first. Because what she ended up telling me was the normal stuff one would do during summer break. Hang out with friends, go to the beach, the summer festival. Don't get me wrong, I would've loved to go do all those things.

But…with my current emotion right now, I probably wouldn't enjoy them.

"By the way, Kyouko." Chinastu said. "Some of us have been thinking. And since I'm the only one here, I'll just go on and ask."

" _Huh? Ask what?_ "

"When you woke up that day, you said that you hated your therapy sessions. Were they _**that**_ bad?"

" _You don't know the half of it._ "

"What they were like?"

" _Uh…_ " I honestly didn't want to talk about it. " _D-Do I really have to explain it?_ "

"Kyouko, please? We're all worried about you. You tried to kill yourself right in front of us."

 _Don't remind me, Chinastu…_

"We just…want to make sure…our friend is okay. You know?" Chinastu looked really sad when she said that last sentence. Almost like she was going to cry. Looking back at it, she was the youngest person there that saw my suicide attempt with her own eyes. And with how she doesn't like scary things, seeing that must've traumatized her.

Now I was feeling guilty. I feel like I owe her for basically ruining her mental innocence. And if she wants to know what went on during those sessions, then it's the least I can do.

" _O-Okay. I-I'll tell you._ " I said.

"Thank you, Kyouko. I'm right here if you need to stop or anything." Chinastu said with a smile.

 _Wow. Was Chinastu…always this kind?_

" _Well…I guess I should start with the first day. It started a couple weeks ago…_ "

* * *

 _ ***THERAPY SESSION: DAY 1***_

I sat in one of the chairs in the waiting room of a therapist office. With my mom sitting next to me. We actually had to leave town to find this one. And even in this town, the office itself was rather small. So I guess the doctor wasn't that well known around here either.

As I looked around the office more, my nerves were starting to get to me. I know I agreed to do this, but…now that I'm actually here…I'm starting to have second thoughts.

"Kyouko, sweetie. Are you feeling okay?" Mom asked me.

"Uh…yeah. J-Just a bit…nervous."

"I see. This is the first time you're going to see a therapist. The nervousness is kinda normal."

"I-I see."

"You know…when I suggested that you should do this, it was only just that. I didn't really think you would go for it, knowing your personality. It was a total shock for me."

"W-Well…wh-what happened to Akari…got me thinking of stuff."

"I understand, dear." Mom said while resting her hand on my shoulder. I don't think I remember being this open to her before. Let alone, showed her that I care for what she's done for me as her daughter.

 _Geez. Was I always like this?_

"Toshinio Kyouko" The nurse called out my name.

"Looks like we're next. You ready?"

"W-Well…I guess." I said. Still racked up with nerves.

With this being my first session, I was hoping that I could have Mom with me the whole time. But when we got to the door…

"Ah. Sorry, Ma'am. Only patients are allowed past this point." The nurse said.

"What? But she's a minor." Mom said.

"Ma'am, we don't use the "M" word here."

"The "M" word?! What kind of childish…"

"Mom. It's okay. I-I'll go alone." I interrupted her.

"You sure, sweetie?"

"It…shouldn't be bad. I just need to let some of this stuff out, you know?"

Mom looked hesitant about it. Especially after what happened just 10 seconds ago. But eventually, she gave in. as she wanted to help as much as she could.

" _ ***sigh***_ Okay, Kyouko. Go on."

"Thanks…Mom."

"Right this way, Toshinio-san. Head for the third door on the right and wait there until the doctor is ready."

"O-Okay."

I walked in the door and followed the instructions to get to the room I was told to go to.

* * *

 _ ***PRESENT TIME***_

"The "M" word? What creepy old pervert made up that ridiculous rule?" Chinastu asked me.

" _Honestly, at times I wished it was a creepy old pervert who became my therapist. But it ended up a lot worse._ "

"Worse than a creepy old pervert? Who was this doctor, anyway?"

" _Well…_ "

* * *

 _ ***DAY 1 CONTINUED***_

As I sat in the room all by myself, looking at everything that was in here, I was scrambling my own thoughts on how to go through with this what should I say first? Should I start with the incident? Or go all the way back?

It was all starting to hurt my mind. I don't usually do this much thinking unless I'm drawing the next Mirakurun doujinshi or something like that. And since I haven't done that in a while, thinking this hard really hurts a ton.

"I think I need an aspirin." I said to myself.

Suddenly, I heard footsteps getting closer to the room I was in. I knew the doctor was coming. I had to mentally prepare for what was about to happen for the next hour and a half.

But…mentally or physically, I wasn't prepared for what was about to come through that door.

"Yeah, yeah. I know I'm late. Bratty 12-year-old wouldn't stop whining about his "non-existent" anger issues. _If you're yelling at the TV telling someone on live chat that you "did their mom",_ _ **you have an anger problem!**_ **The nerve of that brat doubting my advice! I don't see you with a** **master's degree in therapy, you cocky little…** "

The doctor looked at me and realized that she walked into a different room with a different patient.

" _ ***sigh***_ Whatever. Alright. What's got you down in the dumps huh, Blondie?"

…

…

"Hey! Hello!"

"U-Uh…sorry. I-It's just…"

"Just what, kid? I ain't got all day."

"Y-You look exactly like a teacher that I know."

" _ **Tch. Damnit! That woman's giving me a bad rep from afar, too!**_ " The doctor whispered to herself in a fit of rage.

 _That woman?_

" _ ***sigh***_ So I'm guessing that you know a Nana Nishigaki huh, Blondie?"

"Uh…y-yeah." I replied. "Sh-She's a science teacher at Nanamori Middle School."

"Don't you think I know that? Anyway, I'm Ana Nishigaki. Her twin sister."

* * *

 _ ***PRESENT TIME***_

" **Her WHAT?!** " Chinastu shouted with shock.

" _I know._ " I said with a facepalm. " _But it only gets worse._ "

* * *

 _ ***DAY 1 CONTINUED***_

"W-Wow. Nishigaki never mentioned that she had a twin sister."

" **Hmph.** Well, I'm not surprised. That carefree sister of mine probably blew that fact right out of her head. Honestly, that woman."

"It…sounds like you don't like her."

"Well, it's not like I hate her. It's just…hey, wait a minute! Why the hell are you asking questions about my life, huh?! You got some nerve!"

" _I-I-I'm sorry. I-I won't do it again._ " I nervously said while shaking in fear.

Ana let out a small sigh of annoyance as she opened a vanilla folder resting in front of her.

"Whatever." She said. "So your name is Kyouko Toshinio, huh? What broke your sanity so bad that you had to come see a shrink?"

 _Th-That's a dark way of putting it…_

"W-Well. You see…"

I then proceeded to tell Ana the whole story that's happened these last few weeks. As I talked, remembering everything all at once, I started shedding a few tears. I've never felt this emotional before. I never thought actually telling someone all this would make me feel this way.

Unfortunately, from the look on her face, Ana didn't give a damn.

"Yeah, yeah. I've heard this crap before." Was what she said after I finished.

 _Crap?! She's calling my emotional problems crap?! What is wrong with this woman?!_

"But unlike the others, this one actually sounds like a good use of my time."

"Uh…okay." I didn't know what else to say to that.

"First off, let's just this one fact out the way. Everything that happened is absolutely 100% your fault."

"W-Wait. Aren't you supposed to tell me that it's **not** my fault?"

"Why would I tell such a BS lie like that? I don't get paid to baby you kids and make you feel all sunshine and rainbows. If you want these sessions to work, then you need to get rid of that delusional side of yours."

"B-But how…"

"And stop with the stuttering. You're not a 3-year-old, are you?"

"I…"

 ***BEEP* *BEEP* *BEEP***

"Time's up. I'm on my break." Ana said as she turned off the alarm on her pager. She then started walking towards the door with not a single hint of happiness on her face.

"H-Huh? W-Wait…"

"Look, Blondie. I'm too busy today. If you want to talk some more, make another appointment." These were the last words Ana said to me before walking out the room. Leaving the door open in the process.

I sat there in disbelief of what actually happened this past hour and a half.

 _Th-This woman…_

 _Nishigaki's twin sister…_

 _Is my…th-therapist?_

* * *

 _ ***PRESENT TIME***_

"Wow. Just…wow." Chinastu said.

" _ ***sigh***_ _And now you know why I hate going over there. She's like a cold-hearted Nishigaki. The stuff she says…it only makes me feel worse. How the hell is she able to do this?_ "

I started feeling a few tears form in my eyes. Then, out of nowhere, I felt Chinastu hugging me tightly. This caught me off-guard. As I'm always the one hugging her. And never end well. For either of us.

" _Ch-Chinastu?! Wh-What are you…_ "

"It's okay, Kyouko. I know these past few weeks have been total hell for you. And to go to someone like _**that**_ for help. I understand completely."

" _R-Really? Y-You do?_ "

"Sure do. In fact, you can talk to me whenever you feel like you need to let some stuff out. I'm here for you and I'll help however I can."

I honestly had trouble coming up with a response to what Chinastu just said. Those words…never in my life did I imagine her saying them to me. I always thought it would be Yui who would get this attention. But now…

" _W-Wow. Th-Thank you…Chinastu. That really means a lot to me._ " I finally thought of something to say.

"You're welcome, Kyouko. Just helping out a friend."

 ***SOUND OF A DING COMING FROM AN INTERCOM***

" _Attention, everyone. Visiting hours are now over. Please make your way to the exit. Thank you for visiting._ "

"Aw. Already? I feel like I just got here." Chinastu complained.

" _Yeah. Visiting hours are shorter on Sundays. Not sure why._ "

" _ ***sigh***_ Ah well. It was a nice visit today. That story was…really something."

" _Yeah._ _ **Really**_ _something._ "

We both laughed a little before realizing that Chinastu was still hugging me. And she let go with a light blush on her face.

"W-Well anyway…see you tomorrow, Kyouko."

" _Alright. See ya._ "

Chinastu walked out the door and closed it behind her. I was now left alone in the room laying on the hospital bed. Thinking to myself of what just happened. That chat I had with Chinastu was 10x better than with Ana. She actually cared about my struggles. She didn't push them aside like she's heard it all before. Ana may be an expert, but she's nowhere near as compassionate as Chinastu is.

I suddenly grew a smile on my face as I closed my eyes for a nap.

 _Thank you greatly…China-chan._

 _ **AUTHOR'S NOTE:**_ **Introducing a new original character (of sorts). Ana Nishigaki is NOTHING like her twin sister. Which that by in itself is crazy enough. She may look cold-hearted, but she has a soft side. Which will be reviled at a later chapter.**

 **Also, I've been thinking of this idea for another Yuru Yuri story. It won't be in the setting of Akari's Depression. And there will be only one POV throughout the whole story. If you guys are interested, I'll probably start on it tomorrow.**

 **Feel free to review, favorite, and/or follow the story. Thanks for reading. Later.**


	6. The Welcome Home Party

**Chapter 6 – The Welcome Home Party**

The last three days of the suicide watch had come and gone. I was going to be discharged from the hospital today. I'm so excited to be finally leaving this place. Having nothing to do but watch anime reruns, eat fruit cups, and messing with this giant scar on my neck (which is probably something I shouldn't do. But I was bored, okay?).

I had just changed out of the gown I was wearing since I came to this hospital into a grey t-shirt and some blue jeans that Mom had dropped off before she left for her overseas job.

Yeah…she left. She didn't really have a choice. Yesterday she came by and said her final goodbye before catching her flight to England. Luckily, it was just her and I that day. So the others didn't have to see me cry again.

Once I was finished getting dressed, I stood in front of the mirror in the bathroom and stared at the giant scar. It was so noticeable. Taking up the entire right side of my neck. And even the stitches didn't make it look pretty.

" _ ***sigh***_ I really have to go outside like this?" I asked myself. With the amount of rest I've gotten, my voice isn't all low and scratchy anymore. Plus my throat doesn't hurt whenever I yell or swallow stuff.

But the proof that I tried to commit suicide is visible for the world to see.

" _ ***sigh***_ I really got no one else to blame but myself. Maybe Ana was right…"

"You're really going to believe that, Kyouko?" This sudden voice surprised me. When I turned to the door, I saw Yui standing in the doorway. Wearing light-blue clothes and a jacket, which were not usually what she wears.

"Huh? Yui? What are you doing here?"

"I came to pick you up. Someone has to leave with you when being discharged. Hospital rules."

 _Well, that's a dumb rule._

"So anyway…do you really believe what that nutcase of a therapist told you?"

"Damn. So you were listening, huh?"

"Pretty much."

" _ ***sigh***_ Well, what am I suppose to think, Yui? It technically was my fault. If I didn't take those damn toys home, these past events wouldn't be happening right now."

"That may have been the start of all this, but we've all gotten past that. You should too."

"It's not that simple. Because of that, I started hating myself. And when Akari rejected my love confession, I hated myself even more. To the point where I tried to end my life. Sure I survived, but now I have to live the rest of my life with the choices I've made. And by only thinking about it just hurts my already shattered heart. My life is just a pain in the ass."

"Hey. Don't say that."

"But it's true. After all, you, Chinastu, Ayano, and Chizuru tell me straight to my face that I'm hopeless. None of you would continuously say it if it wasn't true. I just hate the fact that it took me so long to notice."

I felt like I was going to cry. But before that happened, Yui walked up next to me and placed her arm on my shoulder.

"Kyouko…I'm sorry. You may have annoyed me from time to time, but saying that you're hopeless was going too far. Especially since this is what it led up to. From the bottom of my heart as your childhood friend, I'm truly sorry for the hurtful insults. I hope you can forgive me."

I couldn't really say a response right away. What Yui said to me was…rather unexpected. Her apologizing to me?! I **NEVER** thought that would happen. Especially with all the times I had to apologize to her for the tricks and traps I've pulled. I wanted to pinch myself to see if I was dreaming, but not now. Maybe when I'm alone or something.

But as of right now, I turned around and hugged Yui as tight as I could. Her words were so touching that I couldn't hold in my tears anymore and let them drip from my eyes.

" _ ***sniff***_ _Thank you, Yui. That really made me feel better. I'm so glad to have a best friend like you._ "

" _Th-That's great, Kyouko. B-But I really can't breathe right now…_ "

"O-Oops. I-I'm sorry." I let go just in time for Yui to catch her breath. Taking sips of water from the sink facet as a bonus tactic.

"G-Geez. You really do have a strong grip. No wonder Chinastu was afraid of you."

"Hehhehheh…yeah." I said while rubbing my head with a little embarrassment. "Anyway, let's go. I'm so ready to get out of here."

I walked out of the bathroom and eventually out the room itself into the hallway. Yui caught up to me and we were now in the elevator heading to the first floor.

"Hey, didn't you come here with shoes?" Yui asked.

"I think. But I had to wear these flip-flops everywhere in the building during the rehab sessions."

"Wait, you had to do rehab sessions?"

"Yeah. Turns out being in a coma for a month makes you forget how to walk. It was a huge pain. Literally."

"I see. Didn't you ask for your shoes back, though?"

"Well, they said I could keep these. So I am. They're so comfy. Like I'm on a cloud or something."

"That's an answer I'd expect to hear from you."

" _Hey…_ " I got insulted.

" _ ***giggle***_ Sorry, sorry."

* * *

Once we got out the elevator, I went to the front desk to get my phone and wallet back from the nurse. It's been so long since I've seen either one, that I had a hard time recognizing them. Luckily, Yui did say that they were in fact mine.

Now we were walking down the streets heading to…

"Wait, where are we going?" I asked.

"Oh, right. We're heading over to my apartment for a party."

"A party?"

"Everyone was so excited about you being discharged that they wanted to throw a party for your return. Everyone's already there and waiting."

"Everyone, huh?" I then started feeling sad once more. And this time, Yui knew what the reason was.

"You miss your mom, do you?"

"Yeah. I mean she's gone for a whole year. And with me held back a year, I'm going to be lonely as hell."

"Don't you have a family member that can stay with you?"

"No. They all live outside Tokyo."

"I see."

"Well…maybe I can think of something down the road. Maybe a roommate or something."

"A roommate? Is that even a good idea?"

"Well, it's something. Not even sure myself."

" _ ***sigh***_ Fair enough."

* * *

We eventually arrived at Yui's apartment building and were standing in front of the apartment itself as Yui started opening the door. I was nervous, obviously. As I haven't seen some of them in over a month. I wasn't sure if they'll take kindly to the giant scar on my neck. But standing out here and worrying about it wasn't going to solve anything. So I had no choice but to go inside.

Yui fully opened the door and we went inside to find everyone standing together. With Akari and Chinastu holding a cake together with something written on it. They all had smiles. Like they were excitedly waiting for my return.

" **WELCOME BACK, KYOUKO!** " They all cheered.

I almost teared up once they said that. I didn't expect to see this many people at once. Some were even a total surprise. And by "some", I mean I'm shocked that Chizuru is here. I'm now well aware that she hates my guts due to an incident at the nearby library back then. I guess Chitose forced her to come. But I bet that she won't come near me at all. I wouldn't expect otherwise.

"W-Wow. Th-This is all…f-for me?" I asked.

"Yep. We all got together and decorated the place a bit." Ayano said.

"We even made this cake for you, Kyouko." Akari added.

"Wow. That's nice and…wait. **ALL** of you made it?" I started getting concerned.

"Not to worry." Himawari said. "We kept Chinastu and Chitose out the kitchen."

" **Are you serious?!** " Chinastu yelled.

" **Is that why you sent us on that ridiculous errand?!** " Chitose asked.

"It was either that, or we would've gotten food poisoning from whatever Chinastu throws in there and/or Chitose's drops of blood." Yui said.

"Come on!" Chinastu whined.

"I guess we should've noticed when we spent almost 2 hours looking for someone named Larry." Chitose said.

"And we even yelled it out too like a bunch of morons. Why did it take us so long to realize that we live in Japan, and there are no people here named Larry?"

"Well, you are kinda gullible, Chinastu." Akari said with a smile.

" _ ***whine***_ _Akari!_ "

I couldn't help but laugh.

"Well, someone's happy." Chinastu felt insulted.

"Sorry, sorry." It was a little difficult to stop laughing, but I managed to do so. Somehow.

* * *

The party itself wasn't as grand as say the one for Akari's birthday. Everything looked like it was last-minute. Which is to be understandable since not even I knew when I was going to leave the hospital. But it was still fun, none the less.

Now the party was over and everyone was going home for the day. I was doing the same…but then I realized something.

"Oh, yeah. Mom's gone. So I'm going to be alone at my house."

I stared at the full moon above the city lights thinking to myself what to do about the situation I got myself into. For an entire year, I can't go to school and I'm going to be the only one at home. All because of my cowardness. My fear of talking to people about my true feelings has lead me down a path that I can't fix. And now…now I must live through my mistakes. Which is something I rarely do. And won't be easy at all.

" _ ***sigh***_ I don't wanna go home. I mean, I know I'll have to eventually. But not now. Maybe I'll walk around a bit."

I kept walking alongside the streets of this small part of Tokyo. Looking at the lights that surround this place. On buildings, towers, signs, lamps, freaking trees, even. They don't call this place The City of Lights for nothing. I'm shocked that I'm able to see the starry night sky with all this going on.

At one point, I ended up at a park that's near the school. Nanamori. Not the high school that I have to wait an extra year to go to. I grew tired of walking (or maybe tired in general) and decided to find a bench for me to rest on. While searching for one, I saw an ice cream stand on the pathway I was walking on. Even though I had food at the party, it wasn't really much. So I was still kinda hungry.

I stood in the line full of kids (because apparently there was a line full of kids at almost 8:00 at night) and waited for my turn to get ice cream. Whenever I feel down like this, there's only one thing that can cheer me up a little.

"1 Rum Raisin please." I said to the stand worker.

But I didn't get a response.

"Uh…hello?" I waved in his face.

"H-Huh? O-Oh. Sorry, Ma'am." He said as he started looking for my ice cream.

 _He was looking at my scar. No doubt he was. Am I going to have people ogling it like I'm some kind of freakshow?_

"Here you go, Ma'am. 1 Rum Raisin."

"Thanks." I said.

As I grabbed my ice cream and started walking away, I could felt multiple pairs of eyes staring at me and my giant neck scar. Some were stares of fear, others were of disapproval. It made me feel uncomfortable. Like these people were looking at me as if I didn't belong here. Like I was a thug or something. I couldn't even open the container of Rum Raisin in my hands. As the stares became more and more unnerving.

" _ ***sigh***_ On second thought…maybe I will go home."

I turned the other way, towards the park exit, and started walked back the way I came. On my way home so that I can have these countless eyes divert their sight away from me.

And leave me in peace.

 _ **AUTHOR'S NOTE:**_ **Geez, it's just one problem after another for Kyouko, isn't it? How is she going to get rid of this one? Stay tuned to find out.**


	7. The Scarf

**Chapter 7 – The Scarf**

The first day of the new school year had come and went. And a few weeks have passed since then. In fact, today's October 1st. And since coming out of the hospital, I haven't done much. I mean, what can you do when you're held back a year?

Not much. Not much at all.

Everyone's in school for 6-7 hours. And finding a job is hard when you don't have any skills outside of drawing. Mom's been sending me money every other week. Mainly for food and groceries.

But to be honest…I've only been spending it on take-out. And then having the take-out delivered here. And to be even more honest, I haven't left my house since that night with the ice cream.

I've been…rather, no, extremely self-conscious about this scar on my neck. That night, when everyone at the park was staring at it. It made me so uncomfortable. So much to the point where I just wanted to cry right then and there. Those looks were all negative. I felt like an outcast. I didn't feel normal. I didn't feel like I belonged. I didn't feel like…me.

And I don't look like me either. Not with this stupid scar on my neck. And what's worse is that it hurts whenever I lay down on it. And I usually sleep on my right side. So sleeping was rather difficult for me.

 ***KNOCK* *KNOCK* *KNOCK***

" _Ugh._ Who can that be? And right when I'm attempting to sleep, too." I complained to myself as I got up from the living room couch and headed for the door.

 ***KNOCK* *KNOCK* *KNOCK***

 ***KNOCK* *KNOCK* *KNOCK***

 ***KNOCK* *KNOCK* *KNOCK***

"Alright! I'm coming! Stop knocking so much!" I yelled. I opened the door and not even seconds after doing so…

"Yo, Kyouko! What's up?!"

"Sakurako…you really need to ease up on the knocking. I already have a headache from the less sleep I've been getting."

"See? I told you she would have a headache." Himawari said

"No one likes a know-it-all, Boob-chan."

"I-I'm not…st-stop calling me… _ ***sigh***_ never mind."

"Do you guys need something?" I asked. "I was about to take a nap."

"Oh yeah, right." Sakurako turned back to me. "Get dressed, Kyouko. We're kidnapping you."

"What?!"

 ***POW***

" **Not like that, you idiot!** " Himawari yelled after punching Sakurako in the head.

"Wh-What did she mean by that?" I asked nervously.

"R-Rest assure, Kyouko. We're not going to kidnap you. But we do need you to come with us."

"Huh? What for?"

"Well…it's kind of a secret."

"That doesn't reassure me at all."

"That why I suggested the kidnapping." Sakurako said.

" **Will you just drop it already?!** " Himawari yelled at her.

"Look, guys. Whatever it is, I'm not going. If I go outside, people are going to stare at my scar. Which is why I haven't left home for so long."

"Oh, that. I can fix that." Sakurako said as she started digging through her bag. "Ta-da!"

"A scarf?"

"It's an old scarf I stole from my sister. I knew you'd be self-conscious about your neck scar. So I brought this with me. Come on, try it on!"

"Uh…okay." I said as I took the scarf from her.

"Won't your sister be upset that you stole her scarf?" Himawari asked.

"Yeah, but Hanako will get over it rather quickly."

"You mean you stole from your little sister?!"

"Well, I couldn't take one from Nadishiko. She'll kick my ass for it."

" _ ***sigh***_ " Himawari facepalmed.

"Anyway…how is it, Kyouko?" Sakurako asked me.

"You know…it's actually okay. A little tight, but it really covers up the scar."

"See? I told you it'll make you feel better."

"Yeah. It…kinda did. Thanks, Sakurako."

"No problemo! Now hurry up and get changed so we can kidnap you!"

"Please stop saying "kidnap"."

"But you got to admit it was a good idea, right?"

I didn't answer her. In fact, I just turned around and headed for my room to change my clothes. While doing so, I could hear the two girls going at it again.

"Why are you so obsessed with kidnapping?!" Himawari asked.

"I'm not obsessed. I just think it was a good idea."

"It's illegal!"

"Not if you tell them you're kidnapping them."

"That doesn't… _ugh_. Never mind. I'm just shocked you managed to pull that scarf thing off."

"You actually doubt my lying skills? And you're supposed to be my childhood friend."

"You didn't lie back then. In fact, you were somewhat a normal girl when you were younger."

"Ignoring that." Sakurako sounded insulted.

"But still…why would Chinastu want us to lie about it?"

"Who knows. Her way of thinking is kinda weird."

" _ **Her**_ way of thinking is weird? I can think of another person who shares that trait."

" **Again, ignoring that!** " Sakurako yelled.

 _Wait, did I hear that right? Chinastu made them lie about it? So does this mean this scarf is from her? And if so, why lie about it?_

I went to the mirror and looked at the pink scarf around my neck. It looked cute on me. And it felt really soft, too. It doesn't even irritate my scar. It was a nice gift. And it brought back some happiness inside me.

 ***KNOCK* *KNOCK* *KNOCK***

"Hey, Kyouko. You ready, yet?" Himawari asked.

"U-Uh…give me a second. I-I'm almost done."

"Okay."

I went back to the mirror and stared at my reflection a little more as I felt the scarf with my hands.

 _So warm…_

* * *

After getting changed, I left my house for the first time since coming out of the hospital and was now following Sakurako and Himawari to who knows where. I asked them a bunch of times where are they taking me. And their only answers were…

"It's a secret."

Or…

"Just be patient, Kyouko."

I was slowly losing my patience with every time they say that.

But then we finally stopped at the supposed location of this secret. And to be honest, I was surprised and confused about the whole thing.

"Uh…guys. Why are we at the middle school? Isn't it closed today?" I asked.

"Yeah. But we can come in anytime we need to do any extra work. As it is the job for the student council co-presidents." Himawari explained.

"Uh… _ **co-presidents**_?"

"L-Look! It was either that, or we get kicked out! We didn't have a choice!" Sakurako yelled.

"O-Okay. I-I get it." I panicked. "B-But why are we here?"

"Just follow us and we'll show you." Himawari said.

"You know, I'm really getting tired of being dragged on like this."

"But it adds to the suspense of us showing you what it is." Sakurako added. "That's how stories on this site work, right?"

"Don't break the 4th wall." Both Himawari and I retorted.

"Just proving a point."

As we entered the school, I started getting rather depressed. Mainly because memories of this place started flowing through my mind. And most of them…were not good.

" _H-Hey, guys. D-Do I really need to be here?_ " I asked in a weak tone.

"Huh? What do you mean?" Sakurako asked.

" _I-I mean…I really don't want to be here. This place just brings up bad memories for me._ "

"But this is your school, Kyouko." Himawari said.

" _ **WAS**_ my school. In case you forgot, I'm not a student here. In fact, I'm not a student at all! The stuff I did to cause that outcome is littered all over this hellhole!"

"Hellhole?!" They both reacted to that one word.

"Look. I appreciate for whatever you guys have planned…but if I have to come here in order to get it, then just scrap it already. I'm going home."

"K-Kyouko!"

I paid no attention to them and kept walking back to the front entrance of this place. Trying not to cry while passing certain rooms (my old classroom, the lunchroom, the gym) was the most difficult part of the whole thing.

I made it outside with tears nearly about to fall from my eyes. And was going to just straight up run all the way back home so I can hurry up and release these tears from my soul.

When I felt a grip around my arm. A strong one, too. And it wouldn't let go, either.

I turned to see who it was who was grabbing me…and was completely shocked.

" _Ch-Chinastu?_ "

"Kyouko…can we talk? Just the two of us?"

I couldn't believe what I was witnessing. Chinastu holding my arm really tight, asking if we could talk just the two of us. I thought this was all sick, cruel joke being played on me. But when I saw the seriousness in her face, I knew that this was real.

" _S-Sure…Ch-Chinastu._ "

And I'm glad that it is.

 _ **AUTHOR'S NOTE:**_ **A talk between Kyouko and Chinastu…what could they possibly talk about? Who knows.**

 **Well…I do. But I'm not telling. At least, not yet.**

 **Find out next chapter. Until then, thanks for reading. Later.**


	8. Return of Dark Memories

**Chapter 8 – Return of Dark Memories**

We both went to a secluded part of the park near Nanamori. Underneath a tree in the shade. Chinastu had gotten us both ice cream (with me getting the usual) as I haven't eaten anything for the day yet. And was starting to get dizzy.

But honestly, I was more worried than dizzy. Wondering what Chinastu wanted to talk about was swarming my mind like a bunch of bees gathering honey. I know I said that I was glad that this was happening. But I was having a few second thoughts.

"Th-Thanks for the ice cream." I said.

"You're welcome. I figured it would make you feel a little better." Chinastu said. And after a bit of silence, she continued onward. "You know I told them that it was a bad idea."

"Huh? What was?" I asked.

"You know. Them bringing you to the school. I told them it was a bad and stupid idea. And Akari agreed with me. But unfortunately, the others didn't think so."

"R-Really?"

"We both tried to stop the idea from happening, but when they got on our backs on coming up with a better idea…w-we couldn't…think of one."

"I-I see."

"I bet you felt horrible, huh?"

I hesitated to answer that question at first. But with Chinastu telling all this, and even saying that she and Akari tried to stop it, I felt like I owed them. Well, in this case, I owed Chinastu. But you get the idea.

"Yeah. I did. I felt extremely horrible. The bad memories I made of that place were re-entering my mind. Akari's accident, the bullying she endured. And then there's my rejected love confession and the endless build-up of guilt that led to my suicide attempt. It was all coming back. _And I wanted to get out of there so I could cry to myself in utter sadness and depression._ _***sniff***_ _**GAAAAAAA!**_ "

I finally broke down. Crying the heavy tears that I've been holding since leaving the school with Chinastu. I told myself that I need to stop crying in front of the others. But with all these dark memories refusing to leave me alone, I couldn't hold back anymore.

Even when I felt Chinastu hugging me, I couldn't stop crying. It was all too much. But I have to admit, her warm body did feel good. Much like this scarf.

" _Chinastu…why? Why is it that I can't get better? Why am I always in pain? It feels like…_

…

… _I-It feels like I'm…always alone with these feelings._ "

"No."

" _H-Huh?_ "

"No. No, it's not true. You're not alone, Kyouko. You were never alone to begin with."

" _B-But I feel like it, though. D-Don't get me wrong, I appreciate the things everyone's been doing for me. B-But I can_ _ ***sniff***_ _I-I can never fully get rid of these feelings. Every time I think they're gone, something happens and then they just keep coming back. I just…_ _ **I just don't know what to do! WAAAAA!**_ "

I continued to cry hard as Chinastu continued to hug and comfort me. It felt really nice and somewhat relaxing. It made me calm down a little, but I was still flowing tears from my eyes. And the fact that they felt itchy and puffy might have been good proof of it.

"Kyouko…it's okay." Chinastu said after another block of silence. "I really do understand and feel for you. In fact, in a way…I-I can…r-relate to you."

" _Huh? What do you mean?_ " I asked.

Chinastu then grew a sad and depressed look of her own as she let go of my body. It looked like she wa about to cry, but not as much as me.

"I…I've never really told anyone this. B-But I have dark memories of my own."

" _ ***sniff***_ _R-Really?_ " I sounded shocked. " _W-Well, I bet they can't be as bad as mine._ "

"W-Well…" Chinastu's sad face only grew when I said that.

" _S-Sorry._ "

"No. It's okay. I don't mind that it was you who said it."

" _Ch-Chinastu…are they really that dark?_ " I asked.

"W-Well…y-you see…" Chinastu's tone of voice sounded more depressed than before. I felt like this confession was going to be the most uncomfortable experience I'm going to hear.

But I'll go through it. For Chinastu's sake.

"…H-Have you ever wondered why whenever we meet up at my house, it's always just me and my sister?"

I never really thought of that before. But now that she's bringing it up, it is a little strange. I don't think I've ever met Chinastu's parents. In fact, I don't think anyone has.

"You know, now that you bring it up, it is kinda weird. N-Not in an insulting way, but…"

"I-I get what you mean. It's not normal at all." She was getting more depressed now.

"Ch-Chinastu?"

"You see…the reason why it's like that is because…i-is because we're orphans."

"Wh-What? O-Orphans?"

I saw some tears falling down from Chinastu's eyes as she continued explaining her secret.

" _Long ago, when we were younger, our mother was constantly being abused by our father. He would beat her every day…as a way for him having control over all of us._ "

"Wh-What the…"

" _And it worked, too. Tomoko and I feared our father. We couldn't enjoy our younger childhoods be we lived in fear of what he would do to us. He would already yell and scream at us. Calling us "useless", "his property", and sometimes just straight up calling us a mistake._ "

 _Useless?_

 _Property?_

 _A…mistake?_

" _But for some reason, he never hit us. We believed that it was because he still had some love for his daughters. But we were wrong. And far off from the truth._ "

I wasn't sure if I wanted to hear the rest. I was already feeling sick to my stomach. But if Chinastu can listen to my dark memories, then I have to do the same for her. So I kept listening.

" _One day,_ _ ***sniff***_ _he called us into the living room. Our mom was lying down on the floor. Motionless and full of tears. We didn't know what was about to happen. He just yelled at us to sit down on the one chair that was there and not say a word._ "

At this point, more tears were flowing from Chinastu's eyes. And she even started shaking a bit. I was starting to get rather worried about all this. What the hell happened?

" _H-He then…_ _ ***sniff***_ _…h-he then started to beat our mother. Right in front of us. Without a care in the world. Her face was bruised and covered with blood. Her body was limp so she couldn't defend herself. Not like she ever tried to in the past, though._

 _We both watched in horror as he continued to beat her. Occasionally, swearing at her with every few punches and kicks. We screamed and cried along with our mother. Begging him to stop. But he said that if we don't shut up, he'll do it to us, too._ "

"Oh, God…"

" _Then…he suddenly stopped. Our mom was bloody beyond compare. We thought it was over. But once again…we were wrong._

 _Our father then pulled out a gun from his pocket. And pointed it right at our mom's blood-covered face. Then he looked at us with a creepy smile and said these words…_

" _Say goodbye to Mommy, girls."_

… _before shooting her once in the head. Killing her instantly._ "

 _N…No way. H-He killed their mom? After beating her repeatedly? Right in front of his daughters? Who would do such a thing?!_

" _We were struck with fear and sadness. Sadness because we just witnessed the brutal death of our mother. And fear because our father was the one who did it. And we thought we were next. I remember holding my sister tight and crying in fear as he continued to stare at us with the same creepy smile._

" _Looky here, girls." He said to us._

 _We both looked to see that now he had the gun pointed to himself. At the top of his head. And still with the creepy smile. We were too terrified to say anything. We didn't know what he was going to do next. And our little kid minds were too small to do anything about it._

 _With the gun still pointing to his head, he placed a finger on the trigger. But before pulling it, he said something to us._

 _His last words._

" _Death…is your only release."_

 _He then pulled the trigger. Shooting himself in the head. And dying instantly._

 _We both screamed in terror as we were now staring at the dead bodies of our parents. Crying non-stop until one of the neighbors came and saw everything._

 _And we were alone ever since._ "

Chinastu finally broke down and cried just as hard as I was not too long ago.

That story…it was truly the worst I've ever heard. The fact that both Chinastu and Tomoko experienced something so horrible. And kept it to themselves all these years later. It makes my problems, and hell, even Akari's problems…a mere pebble compared to her's.

"Ch-Chinastu…" I said. And without anything else to do, I grabbed hold of her and held her in a nice, less clingy hug to make her feel better.

It surprisingly worked. Because she soon stopped crying hard tears and was now returning my hug.

"Chinastu…you're a brave girl." I said.

" _ ***sniff***_ _H-How? I-I let my psychotic father beat and kill my mother…and then let him kill himself. I'm not brave at all._ "

"Stupid. You are brave. The fact that you went on with your life after dealing with that horror. And did a better job than me…for all these years. That sounds brave to me. And I admire you for it, too."

Chinastu then brought her head up and looked at me with her teary-red eyes. And even though they were highly red and swollen, they were still really pretty.

" _Y…You admire me?_ " She asked me.

"Yeah. I really do."

" _K…Kyouko…_ "

We continued to stare at each other for a bit. Then, without any build-up, we brought our heads together…

…and kissed.

It was a long and passionate kiss, too. Her lips were so soft and smooth. It was so good that I wanted more of it. My first kiss ever and I never wanted it to end. But it had to eventually.

We both parted from each other and stared a bit before each blushing a little and looking straight forward with the rest of the park in the distance.

" _W…Wow._ " We both said.

We then went silent once again. I don't know how long, but it felt like an eternity.

"S-So…th-this scarf. You got this for me, didn't you?" I asked.

Chinastu didn't answer with words. But instead, nodded her head. Letting me know that she did buy it for me.

I smiled and grabbed her hand as we both continued to stare at the quiet peacefulness of the park. We both stayed silent the whole time. But in my mind, I had these three words repeating in my mind the entire time.

 _Thank you…Chinastu._

 _ **AUTHOR'S NOTE:**_ **First off, let me apologize if anyone felt uncomfortable during Chinastu's confession of her dark memory. I don't normally write stuff like that, but it felt right in this case.**

 **Anyway…this was a ship I started in Yuri Fever but didn't give it as much focus as I wanted it to. Which is one of the reasons why that story was scrapped. But I plan to make it work here. Thank you for reading. Later.**


	9. Conflicted Feelings

**Chapter 9 – Conflicted Feelings**

It's been a few days since the day I kissed Chinastu. And we haven't seen each other since. Mostly because of her going to school and stuff. Nothing I can do about that.

But…there is a small reason that this separation is happening. Well, I wouldn't call it _**small**_. Not in the slightest. Thing is, though…I don't know what else to call it.

You see…ever since that day, I can't stop thinking about Chinastu. Not just with the kiss. But with that story, too. In a way, we relate to each other.

I mean sure, seeing your father kill your mother and then kill himself is way worse than accidentally stabbing your best friend in the eye, making her lose said eye, and then when you realize that you love her, she rejects you. Saying that she's been taken for a while. I get that.

But what I mean is…we both have these inner struggles that we're trying to get rid of. But they never go away. They keep coming back. And no matter how much we try to hide it, they always show up. sooner or later.

Plus, talking with Chinastu really makes me happy. It's like she's the only person that understands my pain. Which is weird because a couple months ago, she absolutely feared me. Hated my guts, even. Granted, I never felt the same way towards her. But now, I can't even get her cute face out of my mind. It's so…

 ***BUZZ* *BUZZ* *BUZZ***

" _ ***sigh***_ Really? Who's calling me when I'm trying to set up the chapter?" I asked myself as I picked up my phone and saw who was calling me.

 _Yui? What does she want?_

"Hello?"

" _Geez, finally you answered the phone, Kyouko. We've been trying to call you for days._ "

"I turned the sound off for a reason, you know."

" _Come on. Don't tell me you're still mad about what happened the other day._ "

"I'm not mad. I'm just upset. You guys should've known that I didn't want to set foot in that place ever again. It just triggers bad memories."

" _Like we said, we're sorry. But you don't have to ignore us like we're not friends anymore._ "

"Look, do you want something? I'm not in the mood for this."

" _Just come over to my apartment. I've got something to show you._ "

"No."

" _Huh?_ "

"Look, Yui. I'm done with these surprises. Every single one that got thrown at me has only made my life worse. The rejection, the clubroom being blocked off, my mom going overseas, being held back a year. I'm just done. So unless you tell me what it is, I'm not coming over there. And I mean it, too."

There was nothing but silence on the other end of the line. Then I heard Yui's trademark sigh as she got back on the phone.

" _Fine. My cousin Mari is here with me and she wants to see you._ "

"Mari wants to see me? What for?"

" _She just wants to after I brought you up in a conversation. Will you just come over? Please?_ "

 _Well…I haven't really seen Mari since that day with the_ _Mirakurun costume. It would be nice to see her again._

"Alright. I'll be there in a few minutes." I said.

" _Thanks, Kyouko. And I truly am sorry._ "

"Yeah. I know."

I hung up the phone and continued to lay on the couch in the living room. The thoughts from before were swarming my mind like a beehive. So now it's going to take me a while before I can get up and go change.

 _ ***sigh***_ _It just never ends._

* * *

30 minutes later, I finally got off the couch and changed my clothes. I had changed into this white sweater with the word peace written across it in pink. It comes with a black tank that has the right side showing a little. Nothing extreme, though. Along with that was a red & black plaid mini skirt and some old white sneakers I haven't worn in a while.

Also…I was wearing the pink scarf Chinastu gave me around my neck. Not only does it hide my scar really well, but it makes me think of her. Sometimes, a bit too much. But the more I wear it, the more I start to feel better about myself.

After about a 25 minute walk, I reached Yui's apartment complex and eventually knocked on her door. I still couldn't believe I was doing this. It was still kinda odd to me that Mari wanted to see me so badly. We don't really know each other well.

"Oh, good. You're here." Yui said to me as she opened the door.

"Yeah. Here I am."

 _Although I did have second thoughts._

"Mari's right in here. She's really excited to see you again. I had to calm her down a few times."

"Hey, Yui. Why _**does**_ Mari want to see me?"

"W-Well, I…"

"Kyouko!" Yui was interrupted by her little cousin Mari, who ran up to me and gave me a hug out of the blue. Her dark-blue uniform-like dress, two cat-clips in her hair, and the seemingly unamused look in her face made here easily recognizable.

"Hey, Mari. Long time, no see."

"Kyouko. Is it true? Is it really true?"

"Uh…what is?"

"That you have a cool-looking scar on your neck."

I then turned to Yui with an angered look on my face.

"Wh-What was I supposed to say? I-I wasn't going to lie to her." She tried defending herself.

I ended up doing a really long agitated sigh as I facepalmed my entire face. Pretty upset that **THIS** was the reason why Mari wanted to see me.

But then again, she's like the same age as Kaede. And at their age, they get excited about everything.

"Y…Yeah, Mari. I-I do." I said.

"Can I see it? Please, Kyouko?"

 _ ***ugh***_ _Really?_

"Come on, Kyouko. Just show it to her." Yui said.

"D-Don't encourage her!"

" _Kyouko…_ " Mari looked at me with a sad version of her trademarked unamused look. I tried to ignore it...but ended up failing just seconds into the stare down. And gave in.

" _ ***sigh***_ Fine. Just let me sit down first and prepare myself."

"Yay." Mari cheered…

…

…I-I think.

* * *

Once I sat down at the mini-table and calmed my mind a bit (or at least, tried to), I pulled down the pink scarf from my neck. Revealing the giant scar that takes up nearly half of my neck to my best friend and her 5-year-old cousin.

 _Still can't believe I'm actually doing this…_

" _Woah!_ " Mari said.

"Well, it looks like it's healing." Yui added.

"I guess." I said as I fixed the scarf to hide the scar once more.

"How did you get such a cool scar, Kyouko?" Mari asked.

"Uh…" I didn't know how to explain it. There was no way I was going to tell a 5-year-old that I tried to commit suicide. But then what to tell her instead?

"K-Kyouko's…been feeling really sad recently." Yui said. "The scar just showed up on its own."

"Really? Cause Kaede told me that she got it from stabbing herself with a stick."

"Y-You knew?!"

"Yeah. I knew."

" **Then why even ask?!** " I shouted with rage.

"I wanted to see if it was true or not. Did I make you angry, Kyouko?"

 _ **Yes, I'm angry! I'm pissed off, even!**_

I wanted to say that. But I couldn't yell at a kid like that. it's just not right.

No matter how much of a smart aleck she and Kaede tend to be at times.

"Well, there. You got to see it. I'm going home."

"Kyouko, wait. Come on. Let's hang out a little." Yui said.

"Why? Aren't you busy?"

"Not right now. And besides…ever since you got out of the hospital, you've been living a hermit in your own home. It's not healthy."

"Well…I-I can't really do anything. Can't go to school. Can't get a job. I'm using the money Mom sends me just to survive. I don't leave my house. Even if I wanted to."

"Well, you went somewhere with Chinastu the other day, right?"

…

…

" _Y…Y-Yeah._ " I said as my face began to turn red.

"Huh? What's with that reaction?"

"N-Nothing! I-It's nothing! Really…it is."

"It doesn't sound like nothing."

"I think it has something to do with that pink-haired she-devil." Mari said.

"M-Mari!"

 _Ah. I take it that she still hates Chinastu for making Mirakurun look bad. Didn't think she could hold a grudge at her age._

"Well…you aren't wrong, Mari. Well, mostly." I said.

"Huh? So it is related to Chinastu?"

"Yeah. It is. And I guess I have to tell you, huh?"

"It would make the most sense."

"Don't be a smart aleck." I said with an annoyed look.

I then proceeded to tell the Funami girls what happened that day with Chinastu. Well…not everything. I left out the actual story she told me. I don't have any right to tell someone something that personal for someone else. That's just common courtesy.

"So you and Chinastu went to the park near the middle school and talked for a bit. And you found out that she got you that scarf?"

"Yeah, pretty much. We stayed there until I was able to calm down."

"I see."

 _Well, I went and told them. But I still feel really weird. My blushing hasn't gone down yet. I don't want to tell them. But at this rate, I don't really have a choice, do I?_

"You still look rather upset."

"Come on, Kyouko. Tell us so we can make you feel better." Mari added.

I went dead silent for a little while.

"W-Well…y-you see…I…Ch-Chinastu…uh…"

 _Come on! Just say it and get it over with!_

"…W-We kissed."

…

" **H-Huh?! What?! You KISSED Chinastu?!** " Yui shouted after (what I'm guessing) replaying the last sentence in her head.

"I-It just happened, okay?!"

…

" _A-And, uh…I-I really liked it._ "

"Y-You liked it?!"

"It was my first kiss, too. So sweet and passionate. Her lips were so soft and smooth. It was the best moment of my life."

"Wh…Who are you, and what have you done to Kyouko?"

" _H-Hey!_ " I got insulted.

"A-Anyway…I-Is that the reason you've been avoiding us?"

" _ ***sigh***_ Y-Yeah. I-It kinda is. Ever since that kiss, I've been having non-stop thoughts about her. And then I start feeling all hot inside and then I get less sleep from it all. I've been saying that it's because of the bad memories. But honestly, it's not just that anymore."

"I see…"

"And worst of all, I don't even know what it is."

"Huh? You mean you haven't figured it out?" Mari asked.

"No. Why do you sound so shocked?"

"Kyouko. It's really obvious what this means."

" _ **You**_ know what it is?" Yui asked.

Mari nodded her head while still having that unamused look on her face.

Then…she turned to me and said this:

"Kyouko. You're in love with Chinastu."

…

"Wh-Wh-What?! I-I-In love?!" I yelled after doing what Yui did not too long ago.

"Hmm…judging by what you just told us, it does make sense." Yui said.

"B-B-But…I-I-I love Akari!" I then went silent while hanging my head down a little. "A-At least…I-I think I do. I'm not even sure anymore, to be honest."

"Well, maybe you just need to talk it out with someone. One who can make you understand a little better."

"Yeah, I guess."

…

…

…

"Welp. I gotta go. Thanks for the chat." I said as I got up and started heading for the door.

" **W-Wait, what?! You mean you're not going to talk to me?!** " Yui asked.

"You thought it was you? No offense, Yui. But you're really clueless when it comes to love."

" **Cl-Clueless?!** "

"She's right, cousin." Mari said.

" **D-Don't agree with her!** "

"Well, I gotta go. It was nice seeing you again, Mari."

"Bye, Kyouko." Mari said with a happy version of her trademarked unamused look.

" **W-Wait, hold on! How am I…** "

 ***SLAM***

I closed the door before Yui had a chance to finish her question. Akari, Chinastu, Ayano, and I each made a patch that if ever there was a day that Yui found out about her lack of knowledge on love, we would decide fairly on who would get to explain it to her.

(By the way, **NONE** of us want to explain it to her.)

Anyway, about these supposed feelings for Chinastu. Yui is right about that part. I do need to talk to someone about this. And I may not like it, but I do know who to talk about it with.

I took out my phone and dialed a number I thought I wouldn't call ever again for the rest of my life.

 _I can't believe I'm actually doing this…_

"Hello? I'd like to make an appointment."

…

"My name?"

…

"K…Kyouko Toshinio."

 _ **AUTHOR'S NOTE:**_ **Kyouko having feelings for Chinastu? Could that really be true? And who is she willing to talk to about it? keep reading to find out.**

 **So I actually watched Yuru Yuri for the first time in like…4 years or so. I kinda had to in order for me to get a good idea on Mari's character. Who by the way, is FINALLY making an appearance after I said she would a long time ago. In a way, she's a lot like Kaede. I don't remember if the two ever met or not. Didn't watch that much of it.**

 ***SPECIAL ANNOUNCEMENT* I'm pleased to announce that this story, and Akari's Depression, are now part of a series called "Inner Struggles". A series where a specific character will face a huge and life-altering moment and struggle to cope with it throughout said story. I already planned to have Ayano be the next character to experience this. Her story will come as soon as this one finishes.**

 **That's all I have to say. Thanks for reading. Later.**


	10. The Nishigaki Twins' Secret Dreams

**Chapter 10 – The Nishigaki Twins' Secret Dreams**

So here I sat. In a chair at a place that I **despised** being at. What's worse, there's a person here that I **despised** even more. Yeah. It's true. Me, Toshinio Kyouko, hates someone. Strange, isn't it? Well, you'll understand why I hate this person.

And from the sounds of her complaining, it won't be that long either.

"Well, well, well. Look who came _crawling_ back." The woman said as she walked into the room I was in. Gloating at the fact that she's seeing me again.

"It's not like I wanted to, Ana. Don't get cocky."

"Oh, I'm getting cocky. I have every right to since you went ahead and spilled those lies about how I make my patients "feel like crap".

"You do. You made me and a whole bunch of others feel like everything's their fault. What kind of therapist does that?"

"It's the truth. Something you little brats tend to ignore all the damn time. Someone has to throw it right in front of your ignorant faces."

" _ ***ugh***_ " I said with a facepalm. "Just how the hell are you Nishigaki's twin sister?"

"Tch. Whatever."

This may sound shocking, but I actually went back to Ana's office. And she's right about how I told people she makes others feel like crap. That night of my first session, I went online and asked people if they ever dealt with an Ana Nishigaki.

Turns out, I wasn't alone. I soon got a swarm of replies. All from people around my age. Saying that Ana was literally the worst therapist they ever went to. Some said that she didn't care about their problems. Others said she just insulted and berated them the entire time.

I even found a girl who said that she was going through similar problems as me. And Ana only made it worse. The more I read these replies, the more I question just who the hell gave her a degree for this job.

I swore to myself that I would never come back here. And even though I hate this woman with a burning passion, I really had no one else to talk to about this. So I'm willing to take the insults and beratements.

This time.

"So what happened this time that made you come begging on your knees to see me, huh? Finally admitting that your mistakes are all your fault?"

"No." I said.

"Apologizing for spreading that bullcrap you spread online?"

"Like hell." I said.

"Then you're just here to cry and stutter more, then you can leave now, Blondie. I don't have the time or patience to deal with that today."

"Oh my God! I knew this was a mistake! You are such an asshole, I swear!" I yelled as I got up and started heading for the door.

"Well, you've got some nerve calling an adult that, you whiney little bitch!" At this point, Ana started yelling too.

"Screw you!" I wanted to get out of there so badly. This woman has not only put me in a bad mood once again but is blaming me for her business failing. It's not _**my**_ fault that you treat people horribly. Get a change of heart, will ya?

As I opened the door to get into the hallway, I was blocked off by something…more like **someone** , standing in front of me.

"So I'm guessing it didn't go well again, huh?"

"N-Nishigaki?!"

"S-Sis?!" Ana asked. She was just as shocked as I was.

"Hey, Kyouko. Hey, Ana. I guess it's long time no see for both of you, huh?"

"Wh-What are you doing here, Nishigaki?" I asked.

"Well, I came to see how a usual session with my twin sister goes. I heard you were coming over here. So I followed you."

"Y-You heard?! Who told you?!"

"Chinastu did."

"Ch-Chinastu?!"

"In fact, she was kinda on my back a while ago because I didn't tell you guys that I have a twin sister."

"Huh?"

* * *

 _ ***FROM WHAT NISHIGAKI TOLD ME…***_

" **Nishigaki!** "

" **Gah!** " Chinastu had busted the door to the student council room wide open. Scaring everyone inside.

"Ch-Chinastu?! Wh-What's wrong?!" Yui asked.

" **Nishigaki, you have a lot of explaining to do!** "

"Wow. Chinastu instigating Nishigaki? I thought that was Ayano's job." Sakurako said.

"H-Hey! It's not my job! I have other things to do, you know!" Ayano yelled.

" **Not important!** " Chinastu shouted, which got Ayano feeling insulted.

"I don't know what I have to explain, Chinastu." Nishigaki said. "I didn't blow anything up…at least not yet."

" _Nishigaki…_ " Ayano started getting angry.

" **Nishigaki! Why didn't you say anything?!** "

"Huh? Say what?"

" **Don't play dumb! Why is it that you never mentioned that you have a twin sister?!** "

" **WHAT?!** " The other girls yelled in shock.

…

…

"Oh. You mean Ana? Boy, I haven't seen her since we both left for college. What made you bring her up?"

" **W-Wait, it's true?!** " Himawari asked.

" **You have a twin sister?!** " Akari asked.

" _Why didn't you say anything?_ " Rise asked.

"I dunno. I guess I just forgot."

"How can you just forget that you have a twin sister?" Chitose asked. She looked rather insulted, which was a first for everyone else.

"I guess the decades of explosions scrambled my memories a bit. It happens from time to time."

"No surprise there." Ayano said.

"So how do you know about her, Chinastu?"

"Because. Kyouko told me that she's her therapist."

" **H-Her therapist?!** " The other girls asked.

"Oh, yeah. She did get a master's degree in therapy. Kyouko's her patient, huh? I kinda feel sorry for her."

"So you do know about how she acts?" Chinastu asked.

"Yeah. Ana can be a bit too serious at times. It causes her to be grumpy as hell, too. I always suggest to her that she should relax and be carefree like I am. But she would never listen. Saying that the world has no place for carefree people. And ironically, I turned out just fine. Hahahaha!"

"Yeah. You turned out _**real**_ fine." This was said by Akari, Ayano, and Rise as the rest of them watched Nishigaki continuing to praise herself.

* * *

"And that's pretty much why I'm here."

"W-Wow. I-I see."

 _Wow. Chinastu did that for me? Was she that worried about my well-being that she went to confront Nishigaki about this? If so…_

…

 _Then that's the nicest thing anyone's ever done for me._

" _ ***sigh***_ Great. Now I got brats who don't even know me spilling garbage lies. And it even brought my sister here. _Woohoo._ " Ana looked really pissed off that her twin sister was here all of a sudden.

"Good to see you too, Ana. I see you're just as grumpy as you were all those years ago."

"I'm not grumpy! It's just… **Gah! Why am I even talking to you?! Don't you have something to make explode right now?!** "

"Yes. A bunch, actually. But this is more important."

"Did the word "important" seriously just come out of _**your**_ mouth? Since when did you care about what was important?!"

"Since I stopped caring about whatever that old geezer had to say to me."

" **That** " **old geezer** " **was our FATHER, you ass!** "

"Yeah, so? Still don't care. And neither should you. Look what's happened to you, Sis."

"Wh-What do you mean? I'm fine."

"Yeah…I wouldn't call having an Anti-Ana Nishigaki forum somewhere online "fine"."

"W-Wait, wait. Hold on. What about your father?" I asked.

"Right…" Nishigaki said to me. "Our father was a very strict pain in the ass. He had these set goals for us and I wanted no part of it."

"Yeah, clearly." Ana said. "You were always so defiant and disrespectful. Dad was only looking out for us and **YOU** had to treat him like crap!"

"Geez, just hear yourself. He really had you brainwashed good, huh?"

"Brainwashed?" I asked.

"St-Stop saying that!"

"Like I said, he had these set goals for us that we were supposed to follow. We always had the best grades. We weren't allowed to have friends. We weren't allowed to date any boys."

"Date any boys?"

"Well, duh. I am straight."

" **What?!** "

"Why is that a total shock? Just because I tend to hang out with a group of teenage lesbians, doesn't mean I swing that way too."

"Uh…yeah. That's a good point." I said. Still in disbelief.

"Anyway…the old bastard was basically controlling our lives. And I didn't want part of that anymore. So…once we graduated high school, I told him off and left him there to think about how he can't control me anymore. And I haven't seen him since."

"Woah. That's deep. So your father is the reason why Ana is so unlikeable?"

" **Hey!** " Ana yelled.

"Yeah, pretty much. He always had her under his control." Nishigaki then turned to face her twin sister. "Still can't believe you can't see it. Even after both Mom and me left his sorry excuse of a…"

" **DON'T! YOU! DARE!** "

"What?"

" **Don't** " **what** " **me! I'm so tired of you talking crap about Dad! What did he ever do to you?! It's just not fair! The way you and Mom treat him!** "

"Not fair? Ana. Didn't you used to tell me when we were younger what your dream job was?"

"M-M…My dream job?"

 _Her dream job?_

"Yeah. You remember, right? You always wanted to be a writer. You would sit in our room and write these stories. And I would always read them. It was the one thing that made you happy. But then our "father" found out and said something about it. Do you remember what he said?"

" **Tch!** " I watched in shock as I saw Ana clench her fist in anger. Or…what I thought was anger. Cause next thing I knew, I saw tears coming down her eyes. And they looked like…tears of sadness and regret.

" _Y-Yeah. I-I remember. He said…he said…_ "

…

…

"Come on, Sis. You can do it."

" _He…He…_ _ **He said it was a shitty dream! There! I said it! He said my dream was shit! Who tells that to their 8-year-old daughter?! I was so devastated! So much so, that I ended up following the plan he set up for me! And became a goddamned therapist! I never wanted this career! I never wanted that stupid degree that's on that wall over there! I didn't want the constant stress I've dealt with most of my life! Trying to make Dad proud of me! I didn't want any of that! I wish I would've told him off like you did, Sis! But…**_ "

Ana then took a few deep breaths and calmed down a little before continuing on.

"… _But I just couldn't. My spirit was crushed along with my dreams of becoming a writer. I was in a complete state of depression since that day. And I just at one point, decided to talk out my anger towards Dad against everyone I've ever met. I really am an asshole._ "

As Nishigaki went over to hug her twin, I stood there in shock after hearing how much of a terrible childhood Ana had. The fact that she never wanted to do this therapy job. And wanted to become a writer. It was a huge surprise for me. What wasn't one though…was the fact that her father crushed her dreams and made her do this.

 _Geez. What is it with fathers and ruining everything? It's a good thing I never met mine._

"H-Hey…Ana." I said.

" _You're still here? I thought you would've left by now. What made you stay?_ "

"Because. I just want to say…I'm sorry."

" _H-Huh?_ "

"What are you sorry for, Kyouko?" Nishigaki asked me.

"I'm sorry for judging you the moment we met. And then just fueling the hate you get that you totally didn't want. I didn't think you had all this sadness and despair inside you."

I then thought of something that I wasn't sure how she'll take it. But decided to say it anyway.

"In a way, you're a lot like me."

"Huh? Like you?" Ana asked.

"You see…I'm an aspiring writer, too. I often write doujinshi and sell them to people at anime conventions. And honestly, I've been thinking about doing light novels for a while now."

"Y-You? Writing a light novel?"

"Yeah. But the thing is, I don't have much experience in that type of book. Is there a chance I could get another writer's advice every once and a while?"

"A-A…Another writer?" Ana had the biggest look of shock on her face. She looked at her sister, who only smiled at her. Then she stood up from her chair and walked over to me.

Now having a smile of her own.

" _ ***sigh***_ Toshinio Kyouko. You're a weird kid, you know that?"

" _ ***giggle***_ Yeah. I get that a lot." I said with a smile.

"Anyway…here." She gave me her business card she uses for the therapist job. With her name, phone number, and email written on the front.

"That's my personal email. Email me when you finish your first draft. I'll be looking forward to it."

"Wow. Thanks a lot. I'll be sure to do just that."

Ana giggled a bit before heading over to the door into the hallway.

"Well now. I'm done with this stupid profession. I'm going to do something **I** want for a change. See you around…Kyouko."

"See ya…Ana."

"Well, it looks like you two are finally getting along." Nishigaki said to me.

"Yeah. Looks like it. Thanks for the help, Nishigaki. I really owe you one."

"No problem. But really, you shouldn't thank me. You should thank Chinastu for telling me about my sister."

Nishigaki then went silent for a bit.

"You know. It's kinda weird. Out of all the girls, she's done the most for you, hasn't she? Wonder why?"

As Nishigaki left the room, I stood there thinking to myself and, a first since a really long time, released tiny tears of utter joy down my aqua-blue eyes.

 _I already know the answer to that. And it's a good one, too…_

 _ **AUTHOR'S NOTE:**_ **After learning the truth from Nishigaki, Kyouko and Ana are now on good terms. So now that's one of her problems forever off her chest. How will she clear the other ones? Continue reading to find out. Thanks for reading. Later.**


	11. PictoChatting & Endless Laughter

**Chapter 11 – PictoChatting & Endless Laughter**

It's been a few days since I last saw Ana. From what Nishigaki told me, she shut down her office and quit therapy altogether. And is now living with her until she gets her own place.

I was a huge 180 from the first day I met her. A really good one, too. I even told the people I met online about it. And they were in disbelief. I kept getting messages on how I was a hero for stopping Ana's wrath. But I told them that it was a lot more complicated than that.

I didn't tell them what Ana's true passion was. But I did say that she's doing something that benefits both sides. And they seemed to accept that.

" _ ***sigh***_ But now with my therapy sessions gone for good this time, I'm back to having nothing to do all day. And everyone's at school, too."

 ***BUZZ***

knightsenpai: Hey, girl! Whatcha doing?

 _Oh, yeah. It's this girl._

Over the times I've been complaining about Ana, I met this girl online who went through a similar ordeal as me. Yes, it's that same girl I mentioned the last chapter. We've been chatting a lot about that topic. And when I broke the news that Ana's no longer a therapist, we've been messaging each even more. She keeps me company when the others are busy at school and such. So it's nice to have her around.

tomatosenpai: nothing much. Just sitting at home. As usual.

knightsenpai: aw, that sucks. I'm pretty much doing the same thing.

tomatosenpai: Boooo! ***thumbs down emoji***

knightsenpai: LOL! So tru!

…

…

tomatosenpai: You know, I just thought of something.

knightsenpai: what?

tomatosenpai: why don't we meet up? I've been wondering what you look like in the real world.

…

…

knightsenpai: you're not a creepy old perv, are you?

tomatosenpai: no. I'm not.

tomatosenpai: wait. how about you? are you a creepy old perv?

knightsenpai: would a creepy old perv have size D breasts?

…

…

knightsenpai: s-sorry.

tomatosenpai: it's okay. I get it. you're definitely a girl.

tomatosenpai: so? wanna meet up?

knightsenpai: sure. I got nothing to do. where do you wanna meet up?

tomatosenpai: hmm…how about the arcade?

knightsenpai: I'm in. it'll be nice to go there as a customer for once and not an employee.

tomatosenpai: wait, you work there?

knightsenpai: yeah. But I'm off today. also can't go to school because…well, you know.

tomatosenpai: yeah. I know. I am in the same spot as you.

knightsenpai: yeah. tru.

knightsenpai: so I'll see you in about an hour?

tomatosenpai: sure. I'll be the girl with the blonde hair and red ribbon.

knightsenpai: and I'll be the girl with the light-pink hair. a ponytail in the back and a small ahoge on top.

tomatosenpai: okay. I'll keep a lookout.

knightsenpai: oh, and…one more thing. I kinda have this…speech problem.

tomatosenpai: speech problem?

knightsenpai: it's better if you see it in person.

tomatosenpai: uh…okay. well, see ya.

knightsenpai: see ya.

"Alright! I got a meetup! I'm actually excited to leave home for once. Can't wait to meet this girl.

As I was getting up to go change, I happened to get another message. Presumably, from her.

knightsenpai: hey, do you find it weird that we're using PictoChat to communicate with each other?

…

…

tomatosenpai: yeah, it is kinda weird. I bet we're the only two people in the world who still plays with a DSi.

knightsenpai: so tru.

We apparently have a lot more in common than we originally thought.

* * *

About an hour later, I was standing outside the arcade waiting for this girl to show up. The only thing I have to go by is that she has light-pink hair with a ponytail in the back and a small ahoge on top.

…

There's also the size D breasts. But I'm choosing to ignore that. And no, it's not because I'm jealous!

…

 _Well, okay. Maybe a little…_

"Hey!" I turned my head to where the shouting was coming from to see a light-pink haired girl heading towards me. Waving her arm in the process. It didn't look like she took any care with her clothes. As she only wore a white t-shirt with a rainbow-colored logo on it, some black & orange short shorts, and a pair of white sneakers.

Honestly…that would be something I would wear.

"Hey! Good to see you in person!" I said.

"Right? It feels so good to have a friend that isn't exclusive to an app on an old game system. Gets rather stale."

"Yeah. I feel you there. Oh, right. My name is Kyouko Toshinio."

"And my name's… _ **pfft**_ _oh no…_ _ ***chuckle* *giggle* Baaahahahaha!**_ "

"H-Hey! Wh-What's wrong with you?! Why are you laughing?!"

" _W-Well…it's…because…of…my…_ _ **Baaahahahaha!**_ "

I was completely lost about what was happening. Is she some kind of weirdo or something?

…

Wait…didn't she say something about…

"Hold on…is this the speech problem you mentioned earlier?" I asked.

" _Y-Yeah._ _ ***giggle***_ _It is_ _ ***chuckle***_." She then took some time to calm down a bit from that random burst of laughter. "What I have is a rare medical condition called Pseudobulbar Affect."

"Pseudo-what now?"

"It's characterized by episodes of sudden uncontrollable and inappropriate laughing or crying. I've had it since I was 2 due to a brain tumor."

"A brain tumor? At age 2?"

"Yeah. It's been a struggle for most of my life. I often missed days from school because they just flat out suspended me for laughing at the most inappropriate moments. I keep telling them that I can't control it, but they never listen. And eventually I missed so many days, that I got held back. Which is basically why I'm not in school."

"Wow. So you got screwed over, huh?"

"Yeah, it _***chuckle***_ sucks _***giggle***_. It hurt me so much, that my dad suggested that I should do some therapy. And that's how I met Ana."

"I see. You sure did had it rough."

"Not as rough as you. From what you told me."

"Oh, yeah. I guess I did have it worse."

" _ **Baaahahahaha!**_ _I-I'm sorry! I-I really_ _ ***giggle***_ _can't_ _ ***giggle* Kyahahahaha!**_ "

"I-It's okay. I get it. I completely understand, uh…"

"Oh, right. I never told you my name. Well, I'm Cheo. Cheo Izomi."

" _ ***giggle***_ Well it's nice to meet you, Cheo Izomi."

"And it's nice to meet you too, Kyouko Toshinio."

Cheo then started to laugh again. Only this time, I think she wanted to laugh.

"So. Shall we go inside?" I asked.

"Sure. Let's… _ **pfft**_ _hahaha! Gahaha!_ _ **Baaahahahaha!**_ " Cheo was laughing so hard that she nearly fell to the floor. But I grabbed her and held her as we went inside the arcade.

" _Th-Thanks for the_ _ ***giggle***_ _help._ "

"You're welcome. I don't really mind."

 _ **AUTHOR'S NOTE:**_ **Yes. It's true. Cheo returns! If there was one thing I liked about the old story, it was Cheo and her special trait. Not that many people write about a character with a disability. I can understand why, but I wish more people would give it a try.**

 **Now I must say, there are only two chapters left before this story ends. Don't want it to be too long, you know. Thanks for reading, though. Later.**


	12. Hot Spring Haziness

**Chapter 12 – Hot Spring Haziness**

So, yeah. Yesterday with Cheo was nice. Really fun. The most I've had in a while.

We talked a lot. Giving each other advice on how to deal with our problems. And although mine weren't really that helpful for her Pseudobulbar Affect, she did give me advice on mine.

Yeah…I told her. About my crush on Akari. I told her that I've been having this sharp pain in my heart for the past couple of weeks. And I've been avoiding my friends because the pain only grows when I'm with them.

Well…except one.

I didn't use her name, but I mentioned how Chinastu has been doing all these things to make me feel better. I also mentioned the… _story_ she told me and the, uh…

…

…

W-Well…I-I told her that we kissed.

She didn't really seemed phased by it. One, me being gay. And two, asking her for advice on how to confess to another girl. Despite being straight.

In fact, Cheo knew a lot more than I thought she would. And when I asked why, she said that she's the only straight girl in her group of friends. And they asked her the very same questions when they wanted to confess.

 _Woah. She's like a love expert._

Anyway…she basically told me to just be honest with my feelings. No matter what they are. It sounded cheesy. But sometimes, the cheesiest answers are the best answers.

And so. When today came…

"Huh? A hot springs resort?"

"I know, right?!" This was Sakurako telling me this news. "Akari won a whole bunch of passes to the exclusive one just outside of town! You should've seen her, Kyouko! She was blasting the targets like she was a sharpshooter! It was amazing!"

"Especially since she did all that with one eye." Himawari added.

"Wow. That's pretty cool of her."

"Cool?! **Pfft!** Please! More like badass!"

"Uh…Sakurako. I really don't think Akari could be a badass." I said to her.

"What? Do you know any other one-eyed girls who can blast targets with a gun and win the grand prize?"

"W-Well, no. But that's not what I meant. I mean that's she just too pure for that title."

"Yeah, I have to agree with Kyouko on this one." Himawari said.

"Hmph. Alright, then let's ask her ourselves. Hey, Akari! Come here for a sec!"

"What's up, Sakurako?" Akari asked as she walked up to us.

"Quick question. Do you think you could be a badass?"

"Huh? A badass? N-No, not me. I feel like I'll screw it up or something."

"See?" I said.

"What? Come on, Akari. What you did earlier was totally badass."

"Well, not really. I just been playing a lot of The House of the Dead recently."

We all grew a nerve once she said that.

"Th-The House of the Dead? A-Akari, you like that game?" Himawari asked.

"Sure. Why not? It's pretty fun."

"B-But…that game has zombies."

"A-And blood." I said.

"Really? I couldn't tell. I was too busy shooting these blue things with a pistol."

"Akari…the blue things **ARE** the zombies." Sakurako said.

"Really? So then what's the red goop that ends up on the screen when I shoot them?"

"That's the blood."

"Huh. Okay, then. So if the zombies are blue, then who's the tall grey guy with the sharp claws standing in a meaning pose most of the fight?"

" **YOU GOT TO THE MAGICIAN?!** " All three of us shouted.

"Magician? I read it as "Magic Can". Odd."

 _This girl. She couldn't see the game well at all and yet she got to the final boss. What the hell is life?_

"Hey, Sis? Sakurako? You two okay?" Kaede asked as she walked over to us.

" **Kaede! Get this! Akari's been playing The House of the Dead and GOT to the Magician!** " Sakurako shouted. Still in shock.

" **What?! She got to the Magician?! D-Did you beat it, Akari?!** "

"Yeah. I did." Akari answered nonchalantly.

" **WHAT?!** " The two shouted.

"In fact, a couple hours ago I beat it for the 7th time."

" **7 TIMES?!** "

Both Sakurako and Kaede had gotten onto the floor and began bowing down to Akari.

"Oh, great master of shooter games. Please teach us your ways." Sakurako said.

"We are not worthy to as good as you. You are a God." Kaede said.

" **Will you two get up?!** " Himawari yelled at the two. " **People are staring!** "

This was really funny to watch. But I held in my laughter. Just to not embarrass Himawari more than she already is at this point.

"Hey…Kyouko. Are you going to be okay on this trip?" Chinastu asked me.

"Well…despite it being the very last minute, I'm okay with this. It's only one day, right?"

"Yeah, but…knowing how past events went, I'm just a bit concerned."

"It's fine, Chinastu. Really. I don't really plan on doing anything major there. Just sit around and relax."

" _ ***moan***_ Alright." Chinastu still didn't look too sure. But think she gave in just for my sake.

"By the way…I've noticed that you've been letting your hair down a lot lately."

"Huh? This ? Well, I only tried it because Akari was doing it. But now…I've started to like it."

"I see. Well, you look cute with your hair down."

"R-Really?!" Chinastu started to blush. Which made me blush as well. Because I just realized what I just said.

"W-Well…y-you know what I mean. R-Right?"

"Y-Yeah. I-I do. T-Totally get it."

…

…

 _This is awkward as hell…_

* * *

 _ **Later…**_

* * *

" _Woah…_ "

"I…Is this it?" Yui asked.

"Let's see… Burossamuheizu Hot Springs. Yep. This is the place." Akari said after looking at the passes she had in her hands.

"Th-This place is huge!" Ayano yelled.

"Hard to believe that this is a hot springs resort." Chitose said.

"Now that I think about it, are they really going to let 10 teenagers and two 5-year-olds inside this place?" Chizuru asked.

"Oh, yeah. Chizuru's got a point. This place looks like it's for rich-ass people." Sakurako said.

"Don't call them "rich-ass people"." Himawari said to her.

"Well…can't you get us in, Rise? You're the oldest out of all of us." Chinastu asked her.

" _I'm only 17. And even then, they're not going to believe that because of my size._ "

"She said that she's only 17. And even with that, they still might not believe her because of how short she is." Akari translated her girlfriend's whispers.

"Right…"

"Does this mean we're not going inside?" Mari asked Kaede.

"Sounds like it, Mari."

"H-Hey, what about Akane and Tomoko? Can't they help us?" Sakurako asked.

"Can't" Akari said.

"They got class." Chinastu added.

" **Damnit!** "

"And Nishigaki said that she was busy to come, didn't she?" Ayano asked.

 _Nishigaki? Oh, wait. Maybe I could…_

"Uh…h-hey, guys. I-I'm gonna go make a call real quick. Be right back."

"H-Huh? H-Hey, who are you…"

I ran off before Yui could finish her question. Once I was far enough, I took out my phone and dialed a number that was recently new to me. I haven't even called this person yet.

" _Hello?_ "

"H-Hey. It's me."

" _Kyouko? Well, this is a shock. You done already?_ "

"W-Well…no. I actually need a favor."

" _A favor? Of what kind?_ "

"Well…"

* * *

"Alright. I'm back."

"Geez, Kyouko. Where did you run off to?" Ayano asked.

"Yeah, sorry about that. Help should be on its way, though."

"Help? Who did you call?" Yui asked.

"Well…"

 ***SOUND OF A CAR HORN***

"Oh, there she is."

"She?" Everyone asked as small car pulled up in front of us. And out from the driver's seat came a person I haven't seen in a while. Due to some…events, as I'm going to call them.

"Wow. You weren't kidding when you said it was one of those rich people places. How the hell did you managed to afford this?"

"Apparently, from playing The House of the Dead with one eye." I said to the woman.

"What?"

"Hey, wait a second. Didn't Nishigaki said she was busy? How did you get her to come?" Akari asked.

"You didn't tell them?"

"No, I didn't tell them. You and I hated each other back then. So I didn't bother." I said.

"Fair point."

"Wait…hold on. K-Kyouko…is this…" Chinastu stuttered a little.

"Yeah. Everyone…this is Ana. Nishigaki's twin sister."

" **HOLY CRAP!** " Everyone in the group shouted in shock.

" **I-It's actually true!** " Himawari shouted.

" **Sh-She really does have a twin sister!** " Sakurako then shouted.

" **I honestly thought you were joking when you told me, Sis!** " Chizuru yelled.

" **How could I possibly joke about this?!** " Chitose yelled back

"Geez, is it that much of a shock?" Ana asked.

"S-Sorry." Yui said. "I-It's just…"

"N-Nishigaki has never told us about having a twin sister." Ayano said.

" _ ***sigh***_ Honestly, that woman. I really do think those explosions are damaging her head."

"Likewise." Akari and Ayano said. While I'm pretty sure Rise whispered it.

"So these are the friends you mentioned about? They seem pretty normal."

"Yep. We're just a bunch of normal, developed girls." I said. "Although some are more developed than others…"

That's when myself, Akari, Chinastu, Ayano, Chitose, Sakurako, and Rise looked at the only three girls that fit that category.

With looks of jealousy.

" **Y-You don't have to point it out!** " Yui, Himawari, and Chizuru yelled as they blocked the view of their chests.

"Yes. Yes we do." Our group retorted.

" _Ouch._ That bad, huh?" Ana asked.

"It's rather sad." Mari said. "Especially when the big booby trio talk about how painful it is on their backs."

"Or how they can't find any bras in their size." Kaede added.

" _Oh, really?_ " We looked at the trio once more.

" _Kaede!_ "

" _Mari!_ "

"What? It's true." The 5-year-olds responded to their sister and cousin.

" _That doesn't mean you have to tell everyone!_ " Chizuru said."

"Okay, okay. I get it now." Ana said. "So, the reason you called me over is so you could get in this place without being judged?"

"Yep. Pretty much." I said.

"Huh. Should be simple enough. If I know anything about rich people, is that their easy to fool once you screw with their minds a little. Just leave it to me.

"Thanks, Ana. I owe you."

As we began walking up the path to the entrance, I felt a tug on my arm. And turned to see Chinastu doing such a thing.

"So, um… _ **That's**_ your therapist?" She asked.

"Hehhehheh. More like _**was**_ my therapist. In fact, she _**was**_ one almost a week ago."

"Was?"

"She quit being one and is focusing on being a writer."

"What?! How did that happen?!"

"Mmm…let's just say "things" happened. Very personal things."

"Oh. Well…fair enough."

"And uh…I'm going for it, too."

"Huh? Wait, you mean…"

"Yeah. I'm done with Mirakurun. I'm moving on to light novels now."

"Light novels? Wow, Kyouko. That's a huge jump for you. I'm impressed."

"Thank you. But, um…can you not tell the others? I don't want them to know. At least not yet."

"Another secret? Geez. Between the two of us, we're keeping a lot of secrets from our friends."

" _ ***giggle***_ Yeah, I guess we are."

 _Although, there is one secret I plan on telling them…_

"What's so funny?" Chinastu asked me.

"Oh, nothing. Come on. Let's go catch up with the others."

Chinastu looked at me for a bit. Them grew a smile on her face as she started walking ahead of me.

" _ ***giggle***_ Sure thing, Kyouko."

* * *

15 minutes later and we were now inside one of the rooms here. Ana did get us in. And it was brutal, too.

"That. Was. **Awesome!** **I can't get over how Ana got us in this place!** " Sakurako yelled.

"I gotta admit. It was pretty interesting. It was like she got inside that lady's head or something." Yui said.

"I think I almost saw tears at one point. Does she always talk like that with you, Kyouko?" Ayano asked me.

"W-Well…yeah. But she's working on it. I think."

"You think?"

"Ah, who cares about that?!" Sakurako yelled. "We're inside an exclusive hot springs resort! I'm gonna go in all night long, baby!" She then ran out the door while trying to take off her shirt at the same time.

Seconds later, we heard a thump noise from out in the hallway.

" _ ***sigh***_ I'll go get her. Come on, Kaede." Himawari said.

"Coming, Sis." Kaede responded as she followed her older sister out the door.

"I've heard that there's a game room here. Wanna go with me?" Akari asked Rise.

I couldn't hear her response, but she did nod her head. Possibly meaning yes.

The two girls then walked hand and hand to the door. I know it's to help guide Akari around. But then again…they are a couple.

 _It still hurts to see it, though._

"Well then, I guess the rest of us are going in the hot spring." Yui said. "No doubt you're coming too right, Kyouko?"

"Uh…actually. You guys go on ahead. I'm just gonna sit here for a while."

"Huh. Kyouko's actually doing nothing for once. It's rather shocking." Chizuru said.

"H-Hey!"

"No, she has a point, Kyouko." Ayano said.

"A really huge one." Chitose added.

"Tch! _Wh-Whatever…_ " I pouted while blushing a little.

"Holy crap. She's blushing." The four of them said together.

" **Will you get out of here?!"**

Once the last group of girls left the room, I sat myself on one of the beanbags the room had and just stared into nothingness for a bit.

Well, okay. a while. I don't know how long though. But I know it was a while.

" _ ***sigh***_ Well, the setting's changed. But honestly, I still don't want to do anything. Probably because I've done exactly that for about two months. I'm so used to it now."

…

…

"Not that there's anything wrong with it. This is rather peaceful. Clears my mind greatly."

Turns out it cleared my mind so much, that I ended up falling asleep. And someone had to wake me up so I at least ate something for the day.

* * *

Once we all ate dinner, we sat in the room trying to think of things to do until we felt like going to bed. We ended up going with playing charades. And we were suck on this one round with Kaede.

"It's Cupid! It's definitely Cupid!" Akari yelled.

Kaede shook her head no.

"Huh?! How?!"

"You're not seeing it, Akari." Yui said. "Those aren't arrows. Those are guns. Right?"

Kaede shook her head yes.

"Wait. So an angel shooting guns? The heck is that?" Chinastu asked.

"Is this a character from an anime I've never heard of?" Ayano asked.

Kaede facepalmed.

"Well then what is it?" Himawari asked.

Kaede pointed to her eye. Then moved it down her cheek. She did this several times. So that the others would get it.

"Crying?" Chitose asked.

Kaede shook her head yes.

"So…a baby?"

Kaede only squeezed her tiny nose in frustration. As these girls were getting nowhere with these guesses.

Rise and I were sitting on the side watching it all. As we didn't want to play. And while they were stuck, we figured it out after the third clue.

"I'm really struggling to decide it we should tell them or not." I said this to myself. Because basically…even though Rise is right next to me, without Akari to translate her whispers, I wouldn't be able to understand her at all.

" _Yeah, me too. It's rather sad._ "

…

…

Or…maybe I can.

"W-Wait, hold on. I just heard you say something."

" _Huh?! You heard me?! As in, you_ _ **ACTUALLY**_ _heard me?! This isn't a joke, right?!_ "

"Nope. Not a joke. I can hear you clear as day."

" _W-Wow. I-I can't believe it. It actually came true._ "

"What came true?"

" _U-Um…nothing important. Just talking nonsense._ " Rise looked away form me with a light blush on her face.

 _Woah. Now that I can hear her, Rise is a lot more expressive than I thought she was._

Then at that moment, a thought came to mind. Well…more like a question. It's been bugging me for the longest time. I didn't know how to ask it or to ask it to. But now that I can hear Rise, I might as well ask her.

"Hey…Rise. I-I've been meaning to ask this. For a couple of months, really."

The more I wanted to ask this, the bigger the pain I felt in my heart. Because I knew whatever the answer was, it was only going to hurt me.

But…I just have to know.

In order to finally move on.

"H-How did…y-you and Akari…you know. Fall in love with each other?"

Rise went silent for a bit. Slowly turning her head from me as she tried to think of answer.

 _She must be hesitant to tell me._

" _Well…we just have a lot in common._ " Rise finally said.

"Like…"

" _We both kept getting ignored, forgotten, left behind, we barely had any friends, kept getting told we had no presence…_ "

 _Damnit. I know what she's trying to do._

"Rise. Knock it off. You know what answer I want. It's okay. just…lay it on me already."

…

…

" _ ***sigh***_ _Alright._ " She finally gave in. " _It was near Christmas time last year. Everyone had gone home for break and I…I was still at school. In the middle of the hallway. Crying heavy tears by myself._ "

"You were crying? What for? Did something happen?"

" _Well…not exactly. You see…back then I was_ _always lonely during Christmas time. My parents often travel a lot for business. And every year, they always had to work on Christmas._ "

"Work on Christmas? That's insane! What do they do, anyway?"

" _I…I can't really tell you. I don't really know myself. They never had the time to explain it to me._ "

"I-I see…"

 _Come to think of it, I don't even know what_ _ **MY**_ _mom does for a living._

" _Basically,_ _I used to hate this time of year and wanted it to be over and done with already. I would sit in the hallway after school on the day before break and watch as the other students talk about spending the holidays with friends and family. All while holding in my tears of depression until the halls were completely empty. So that no one would have to see me cry._ _Last year was about to be the same depressing outcome…_ "

Rise then went silent again. This time while removing the tears from her eyes.

" _But then…that's when Akari showed up._ "

"Woah. So she saw you cry?"

" _Yeah. She did. And she kept asking what was wrong with me. It was the day I found out she could hear me, but I was too depressed to care. So I kept telling her to go away. But…she won't take that for answer. That's when I gave in, and told her everything._ "

"I see. And once you did, she offered to spend Christmas with you, huh?"

" _Yeah. And like before, she refused to take no for an answer. I swear, she can be a little…what's the word…_ "

"Selfless?"

" _Yeah. That's it. She's too selfless._ "

"Yeah, I feel you. I grew up with that trait of hers. And she never notices it, either."

" _ ***giggle***_ _Yeah, that's true._ " Rise said with a smile.

"So, I'm guessing that once you two spent Christmas together, you hung out some more and eventually gained feelings for each other?"

" _Yep. Pretty much._ _But I was too nervous and shy myself to confess to her, so we stayed friends for a while. Due to my feelings for Akari, I sometimes had trouble looking at her in the eye when we had conversations. And I would start blushing every time we came close to each other._

 _And you know what's funny? I was too blinded my love for her to see that Akari was doing the exact same things I was doing. Neither one of us knew of the other girl's feelings, but Nishigaki did. And just three months ago, made us confess our love for each other._

 _We were so happy that we became a couple, but we were too nervous to tell you guys. So we kept it a secret, and even got Nishigaki to promise not to tell. And it worked out, too._

 _That is until… the accident and such._ "

"R-Right." I started feeling my gut churned as I remembered that horrible day.

"You know I meant it when I said I was sorry. I never meant for that to happen."

" _I know, Kyouko. It was just that. An accident._ "

"Y-Yeah, but…" Now I was the one hesitating. "That accident spawned a whole series of events no one was expecting. Me going to therapy, Sakurako and I confessing our love for her and getting rejected, my attempted suicide…it was all caused by the complete laziness I used to have by not taking those damn toys home like I should've. This whole mess is my fault. And I'm paying the price for it. Hard."

" _Kyouko…_ "

"But…I'm okay, now. I'm learning to accept all that. Granted, at a slow pace. But it's a process. I'm not going to let my giant neck scar, depressed mindset, or shattered heart take over my life. It'll take some time for me to get over my feelings for Akari. But I'm glad that she happy once again."

Rise only looked at me with a face of pure shook. I can bet that she never expected those kind of words to come out of my mouth. Especially since how I used to act before the accident. But I meant what I said. And I'm proud of it, too.

And from the look on her face, Rise was as well.

" _Th-Thank you. Thank you, Kyouko. You really are a good friend._ "

 _G-Good friend? W-Wow. First I've ever heard that. And it…felt good to hear._

"Thanks, Rise. That really means a lot." I responded.

" **Gah! I give up! This thing's too damn hard!** " We heard Sakurako shout.

 _Oh, yeah. The game. Forgot about that._

"You guys still haven't figured it out?" I asked.

"No. And the clues were no help at all. I'm really starting to think it's something only Kaede knows." Ayano said.

" _Guys. The answer's really simple._ " Rise said.

"Simple? How is it simple? You know what it is, then?" Akari asked.

" _Both me and Kyouko figured it out. In fact, we knew it by the third clue._ "

"She's right." I added.

"Huh? Wait, Kyouko. You can hear Rise?! Since when?!"

"Only recently. We were just talking about something while you guys kept failing at these guesses."

" _Oh, really?_ " Yui asked. "Then why don't you try and guess?"

"Fine. I will. What were the clues again?"

Kaede then repeated the clues she gave out. The gun gestor, her imitation of her crying, and even added one where she had wings on her back and pointed to the calendar which was flipped to the month of May.

It was this point the answer was more obvious than ever before.

"Is it Devil May Cry?"

" **Finally! Someone got it!** " Kaede yelled in a mix of excitement and anger.

" **What?!** " The rest of the group shouted.

" **How the hell was that Devil May Cry?!** " Chizuru asked.

"Duh! It was obvious! You kept saying that the wings were of an angel, but devils can have wings too. There was also me imitating that I was crying. And I even pointed to the word May on the calendar. And yet, you guys couldn't figure it out. I was about to lose my patience."

"Geez. What a rip-off." Chinastu complained.

" _Wait a second._ Kaede…how do you know what Devil May Cry is?" Himawari asked.

…

…

" _Uh…in…internet?_ " Kaede said nervously.

" _Kaede…_ " Himawari was slowly getting angry.

" _ ***gulp***_ _I-It wasn't my fault! I-It was Sakurako's! She made a bet that I couldn't kill more demons than her!_ "

We all then turned to Sakurako, who was trying to silently leave the room while Himawari was distracted. But she ended up getting caught.

" _Sa…kur…a…ko…_ "

" _ ***gulp***_ _Aw, shit._ "

…

…

" **RUN FOR IT!** "

Sakurako then bolted out the door and down the empty hallways of the resort.

" **GET BACK HERE! YOU BLONDE IDIOT!** "

With Himawari running after her. Pissed as hell that her best friend let her 5-year-old sister play a video game that has you killing demons with swords and guns.

How are those two friends?" The rest of us asked in disbelieve.

 _ **AUTHOR'S NOTE:**_ **Yep! It's back! I finally regained the passion to write this story! And it's a long one, too. Hope you guys don't mind.**

 **So here's secret. Even though Yuri Fever is gone, I still use some of its writing for this story. The whole conversation Kyouko had with Rise was literally from that story. A lot of things from there are going to be used for this series. Including for when I start Ayano's story. So you may find some familiar texts down the road. Just a head's up.**

 **So anyway, that's all for now. Like I said in the last chapter (I think), the story's almost done. Next chapter will be the finale. Keep a lookout for it. Later.**


	13. Kyouko's Restored Heart

**Chapter 13 – Kyouko's Restored Heart**

We eventually got Himawari to calm down and not send Sakurako six feet under. Though we have to separate the two in fear of Himawari getting worked up again. I knew the two have fought before, I've never seen her that angry before. It was shocking, to say the least.

So now everyone had gotten tired from the game and went to bed. There was these mats stuffed in the closet along with blankets and pillows. There was enough for everyone to have their own, too. So once we changed into pajamas, we all went to bed for the night.

Only…there was a problem to that.

" _ ***sigh***_ _I can't sleep._ "

It's true. I couldn't sleep. That nap earlier really affected my sleep pattern. I was wide awake and didn't feel like I was going to sleep anytime soon.

 _Well…since I'm here, I might as well use the hot spring._

I quietly got up and left the room. Heading for the changing room before I could go to the hot spring itself.

* * *

"Woah. This thing's big." I said as I looked around the area. It was pretty impressive to look at. Small waterfalls being formed from tiny rock mountains that are pouring into the lake-sized bath. Which was already bubbly from how hot the water is.

After staring at it for a good bit, I finally decided to actually go inside it (which is its intended purpose, after all). I unwrapped the towel from my body and slowly dipped into the water. I was almost completely in when…

" **Gah! It burns!** "

I held my neck in pain as it was stinging from the hot water. The scar may be healing, but it still hurts whenever I touch it. Or in this case, makes contact with warm water.

" _ ***sigh***_ I can't catch a break, can I?"

I grabbed the towel from the floor behind me and wrapped it around my neck. This was, the scar won't make contact and sting like hell. I was then able to relax and enjoy the hot spring to myself.

As I sat there, I looked up into the sky and saw the multiple stars surrounding the full moon that was up in clear view.

"It's really pretty out tonight. I hardly ever get to enjoy these kind of nights. Nice to finally do so."

"C-Care to have someone join you then?"

After hearing that, I turned my head to see Chinastu standing near the door. With a towel wrapped around her body.

"Ch-Chinastu? What are you doing up?" I asked.

"I-I was going to ask you the same thing. I woke up and saw that you were gone. So I went looking for you and saw that you were here."

"I-I see. W-Well…I just couldn't sleep. So I thought I could use this hot spring before we leave tomorrow. You could join if you want."

"Tch. S-Sure. O-Okay then."

Chinastu soon got into the water next to me and we were now sitting together in a hot spring.

Together…

In a hot spring…

Completely naked…

…

I did **NOT** think this through.

 _Damnit! What was I thinking?! I'm now sitting in a hot spring alone with Chinastu completely naked! In most cases, this means absolutely nothing. But right now, it means absolutely_ _ **EVERYTHING!**_

"S-So…th-this is nice. I-Isn't it?" Chinastu asked me.

"Huh? O-Oh, yeah. I-It is rather nice."

…

…

"Y-You know, Kyouko…I-I was really shocked that you agreed to come with us. I thought you lost trust in us after what happened last time."

"Well…I do admit, I was mad that they brought me to Nanamori without any warning whatsoever. But…I was hurting back then. I still am now, but not as bad as back then. I'm…slowly recovering, as one might say."

"I…I see."

"That isn't to say that I don't appreciate what everyone's being doing for me. I'm really lucky to have friends like you guys."

I then went silent for a bit.

"E-Even though…I pretty much took you all for granted before."

"Huh? Wh-What do you mean?" Chinastu asked with worry.

"Don't deny it, Chinastu. You know how I used to be. Annoying, selfish, ungrateful, hopeless, and above all…a jerk. I knew people put up with it. But you guys didn't have to. You should've quit being my friend when you had the chance. Things might have been better off if you did."

" _Kyouko…_ " Chinastu softly whispered. I saw tears run down her eyes. But before I could point it out, she wiped them away. And looked at me with a serious look on her face.

"L-Look. What you just said about yourself may have been true. Yes, you were unbearable at times. And yes, I even did think you were a self-centered asshole. I did in fact hated you. You were the vain of my daily life.

But then…that day came. The day of Akari's accident. Of course, everyone was worried about her. But you were downright scared. I noticed you shaking a lot when we were at the hospital that day. You were a nervous wreck."

"O-Oh, yeah. I-I guess I was." I said. "But…"

"Knowing you back then, I thought you would just brush it off the next day like you did with other problems we had. But…what came after that day. Asking Akari if she hated you, going to therapy, confessing your love for her and getting rejected. And then that alone caused even more stuff like…th-that…s-s-suicide attempt. I-I never thought you had it in you to do something like that. _And…_ "

It was at this time where Chinastu started to cry again. But like last time, she wiped her tears away before I could point it out.

" _A-And I was so scared. Terrified, even. Seeing you bleed out from your neck with a stick lodged inside it. It's a cursed image that has since never left my head. I couldn't focus at all. You were always in my mind. S-So…So I came by and visited you when you were in that coma._ "

"Y-You did?!" I asked in shock. Not expecting to hear that truth.

" _Y-Yeah. I came every day for that entire month. Even when the others were busy. I stayed for the entire time. Until visiting hours were over. Seeing you in that state. That giant scar on your neck…covered in blood. I hated looking at it. But I did it to keep you company. Even though you had no idea I was there._ "

"W-Wow. Ch-Chinastu, I had no idea. That was really nice of you to do that…"

As I praised her for willingly coming the hospital every day to visit me, more things came to mind. More things that she did for me when I was struggling.

"…A-And, uh…I'm really grateful for you buying that scarf for me. I really like it."

"O-Oh, yeah. Gl-Glad you like it."

"And Chinastu…thank you for getting Nishigaki to talk to Ana. That really helped a lot. Knowing that was you really made me happy."

"I-It did?!" Chinastu turned to face me with a heavy blushed tint on her face. Seeing that made me do the same.

"Yeah. It did. In fact, it even made me realize something."

"R-Realize…something?"

"My love for Akari is a strong one. Ever since I got rejected, it's been eating out my heart bit by bit. Until at one point…it was gone. I had spiraled into a deep depression that seemed endless. And with Akari losing an eye, Ayano feeling heartbroken from me ignoring her feelings for me, and the Amusement Club shut down, it all made it worse. And I ended up doing…well, that."

I was now feeling tears coming down from my own eyes as I remembered everything that has happened to me in the past 2-3 months. It was tough. But…But I managed to calm down enough to continue.

"But…with you now telling me how it all affected you. And what you did for me to get better. I can never forget that. I honestly don't deserve a friend like you, Chinastu. You're the greatest."

"W-Wow, Kyouko. Th-That's…"

Before Chinastu could finish, I grabbed her hands from beneath the water and brought them up with mine. Holding them tightly together as I stared deeply into her green-ish eyes.

 _H-Here I go. It's now or never. I can do this!_

"Which is why…despite my feelings for Akari, I can no longer ignore this feeling I have. I have to say it. Or else it'll eat away my heart once more."

I then took one last deep breath. Before staying the words that make me feel like the happiest girl in the world…or send me back into the spiral of depression all over again.

"Chinastu. I…I love you."

Tears started running down my face as I said that. but I didn't wipe them away. Instead, I let them run. As I waited for an answer from Chinastu, who was frozen in shock from what I said. Tears were also running down her eyes. But like me, she didn't wipe them away.

" _K-Kyouko…y-yes._ "

"Yes? what does that mean?" I asked.

" _It means…yes. I-I…I-I love you too. I've always have for a while now. But was too scared to confess. With your feelings for Akari and all, I thought you would reject me. But to hear that you feel the same way…I couldn't be any happier. I love you, Kyouko Toshinio._ "

" _Ch…_ "

" _Ch…_ "

" _ **China-chan!**_ " I shouted with pure joy as I rushed over to hug and kiss her…

…But then she jerked back quickly and I missed her completely. Almost falling face first into the water.

"Wh-What's wrong?" I asked. "Don't you love me?"

"W-Well, I do. B-But I really don't want to be hugging and kissing in warm hot springs water of all places. I-I'm not ready for what could happen after that."

"What could happen?" I honestly had to think about what she meant by that. And after a few seconds, I figured it out.

And started blushing like crazy.

"O-O-Oh. Y-Y-You mean…th-th-that. Y-Yeah, I'm not ready either."

"Sh-Shall we get out now?" Chinastu asked.

"Y-Yeah. I-I think I'm getting tired now."

We both got out the tub and wrapped towels around ourselves as we went to put our clothes back on and eventually headed back to the room with everyone else.

With our hands held tight. Symbolizing that we are in fact…a couple.

* * *

" **N-No way! I-Is this for real?!** " Akari asked.

" **You two are a couple now?!** " Sakurako asked.

It was the next morning and we were getting ready to leave the resort. It was at this time that Chinastu and I decided to tell everyone the big news.

"Yep. We confessed our love for each other last night while you all were asleep." I said.

"It was so sweet. I even cried a few times." Chinastu added.

"Wow. This is rather unexpected." Ayano said.

"Right?" Chitose added. "And I missed it too by being asleep. _The amount of yuri goodness that must've happened after the confession. I can only imagined how good it felt when one of you reached your cli…_ "

She was then interrupted when Chizuru placed a piece tape over her mouth.

"It's honestly sad how effective that is." I said.

"You get used to it." Both Chizuru and Ayano replied in an exasperated tone.

"W…Well, anyway…congratulations, you two. I hope it works out for you both." Yui said.

"Thanks, Yui." Chinastu said.

"Hey, didn't you used to go on and on about wanting Yui to be your…"

 ***BONK***

"Ow! What the hell?!" Sakurako yelled after Chinastu threw an apple at her.

"Let's not make wild accusations like that, Sakurako." Chinastu said with a pissed off smile.

 _ ***giggle***_ _So she doesn't want Yui to know that she had feelings for her. Good idea. It's best for her not to know._

 ***RING* *RING***

" _Hello? You're here? Alright, we'll be right out._ " Rise hung up her phone and turned to face Akari and me. " _Nishigaki's here. So is Ana._ "

"She said that Nishigaki's outside waiting for us." Akari translated.

"And she brought Ana with her." I translated.

"You know, it's still odd how you're able to hear what Rise is saying all of a sudden." Chinastu said to me.

"Well, it just happened I can't explain it either."

" _ ***sigh***_ Well, whatever. Let's get going before the Nishigaki twins get impatient." Yui said.

"Or worse, Nishigaki makes something explode in the little free time she has." Ayano added. Her face looked exasperated because she knew it was a possibility.

As the group started heading out into the hallway, I grabbed Chinastu by the arm and held it tight. Forcing her to not move and look at me.

"I'm really glad you became my girlfriend, Chinastu." I said. "This is the best thing you've done for me by far."

Chinastu giggled a bit before giving me our first kiss as an official lesbian couple. Which ended with us staring into each other's eyes in pure bliss.

"I love you, Kyouko."

"I love you too, Chinastu."

And it was at this point that I realized…for the first time in a good long while, my heart is no longer shattered.

 _So now begins my life…with a restored heart._

 _ **AUTHOR'S NOTE:**_ **And so it's finally over. Kyouko is no longer suffering from the ginormous pain in her heart. She's finally moved on. And has Chinastu by her side to help.**

 **This is a ship that I'm pretty sure no one has ever thought of. Or if they at least did, no one's ever written it. The main reason I decided to do this series is to fix that a little bit. I mean, I know the current ships are so obvious that they're really hard to not notice (I mean, they do throw it in your face a lot), but they're starting to become stale. Hopefully, this causes others to experiment other possibilities. Although, I'm not forcing it.**

 **Anyway, thank you all so much for reading this story. Even though I had a few hard times with it, I still had fun writing it. The responses have bee great, too. Thanks again for that.**

 **Yuru Yuri +1 will return soon. But as of now, I'm taking a break. But the 3** **rd** **story to the Inner Struggles series: Ayano's Negative Side, is coming soon. Look forward to it.**

 **Until then, thank you all for reading. Later.**


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